WiNdS Of ChAnGe

Once again

2011-10-24T00:08:00.000-02:00

Swirling around my mind, toying with mysoul,

there's no way to break loose from myhaunting thoughts,

And here I am, once again, disarmed andall alone

endeavoring to fight a war I havealready lost.

By displaying my bogus laughter,casting my elves away

I will need no magic, no compassion, nosavior to arise from hell.

My wings know the path to lead me outof this darkness

if only I could stand unseen to becomea better fighter.

Time goes by, it always does, I driftalong the stormy nights

the shore will claim my coming back,and I'll return when I feel fine.

Leave me alone, I need to mourn, I needto heal my very soul

Should you see I feel the blue, try notto hound me out my place

for when I'm ready I will come back,as my phoenix does time after time.

2011-10-07T14:59:00.000-02:00

Once upon the time, or maybe some daysago, there was a guy who believed that his ex wife deserved hisfriendship. Moreover, he would argue with his new couple affirming hewouldn't take their private conversations to a halt since there wasnothing wrong in chatting with his Ex . Odd as it may seem, all hiswords were far-fetched since his present couple never expected him tostop anything, let alone required such action. Thus, she neverunderstood why on earth he was raising his shield and claiming “I'mnot going to live my life fearing you might feel hurt or not!” whenthe only words she once said were“I simply believe that's notcorrect”. Indeed, he could do whatever he wanted to do with hisformer relationships, and that was hunky-dory with her since thatgave her the same freedom. If it wasn't improper for him, it wouldn'tbe reprehensible for her either, would it?

Long after that, this same fellowuploaded a pic with his previous wife and other friends to a socialnetwork, and though by the time the picture was taken they weredivorced, this person had told his new partner that during thosedays, he and his ex had had a casual sexual encounter. Come on! Wakeup boy, that' pic was so out of place!

However, when his present couple sawthe picture she decided to say nothing about it. If it was all rightfor him, there was nothing to say. The problem came when he asked herif she had seen something he had posted on his wall (not the pic butanother thing) and she said: “No, I try not to visit your profile,there are things I prefer not to see” Oh boy, he went crazy whenshe explained why.

Again he came up with his not-so-cleverstatement ““I'm not going to live my life fearing you might feelhurt or not!” and so on. He also dare to say: “You ALWAYScomplain about what I do”

Always? Complain? Wait a minute, saywhat? Relax and hold your fucking horses! She never said a word aboutthe pic until you asked, so yelling “always” is an overreaction,and if you hadn't insisted to know the rason, you would've NEVERknown anything. It goes without saying that when you ask a questionyou may get an answer you don'tt like, then, face it!

Some men tend to believe they are neverout of place. Here's a piece of news: Most of the time they are!

Let me tell you some facts I do know.When his wife broke up with him and left, she commented to all herfriends that he wasn't worthy, that she had to provide for himbecause he didn't bring money nor he moved a finger to do it, hence,he was a playboy. She said she deserved and looked for someone betterand richer, (like a doctor) She completly look down on him becauseshe considered he was less in all aspects.

I guess he doesn't know all that, but Igot the info from a reliable source, herself!

So, now either you goes and keepscrawling around her feet until he gets his degree and worth somethingfor her, or pay attention when his new partner tells him something,she may be right.

Just a thought...

2011-08-17T00:57:00.003-02:00

No, it's not that I'm no longer in love with you, I am.

No, it's not that I don't feel your love anymore, I do.

No, it's not that I don't care about you, because I do.

No, it's not that you don't care about me as you used to.

But if one day, you happen to realize

that I don't say "I LOVE YOU" like I did before,

it's just that sometimes, at least once in a while,

I wish it were me the one who says:

"I LOVE YOU, TOO"

Three times a ........

2010-04-12T14:49:00.003-02:00

Sorry my friend, it is not my fault if you drop tears for fear and you feel you’ll die if he dumps you. It is not my fault if you feel that fear at all. When you play with fire, chances are that you get burnt. When you betray a friend you are nothing but a betrayer.
So, you wanted to plagiarize my life and have what was mine in the first place, didn’t you? Look at you now, crawling like a snake (should I say “as” a snake? Hummm good question)
Let me tell you a few facts. You will always know someone else will do the same to you, and you will be suspicious even of your own shadow.
You will beg him to stay with you, but you’ll always have the certainty he will leave you some day. Nothing built on shit stands a chance.
Oh poor you! So, you are already crying?…. That happens.
Those who act like a weasel and feed with things they steal from others are never happy, unless they have no heart…Do you have one?
He is with you now, right? What will happen tomorrow? Are you sure he’s not with someone else? ….. Me?
I wonder how it feels to be doomed to hide your real personality so no one realizes the kind of bitch you are. Well, I got some news, though. People talk. Are you defending yourself from your own mistakes by talking shit about me? Gosh, that’s so you! How could I have been so blind not to see it before? I offered my friendship and you laughed at me. Big deal, look who's laughing now.
I ask now… Is it working? Does it feel better? I mean, does it make you a better person? Don’t lie to yourself my friend. Truth will hit you on your very face one day.
Believe me, you are alone because you look for men where you shouldn’t. They are not bad guys, you are….so don’t go asking for comfort, you don’t deserve it.
I do have a heart and you didn’t care, but relax, that made me stronger; however, what you did will weaken you day after day. Now it’s me who doesn’t care.
You are not good as a friend; you are not good as a woman. Deal with that.
I’m glad I finally saw your essence; the rest is not my problem anymore.
I’m done with you now.
I can sleep tight, can you?

HISTUDIO.TV

2010-01-25T16:54:00.002-02:00

DALE CLICK A LA IMAGEN PARA ACCEDER A NUESTRA RED SOCIAL, TE VA A ENCANTAR!!!

Chronicle of Death Not Foretold

2009-09-04T09:32:00.001-02:00

A woman has died in the silence of her solitude.
It is said that she dedicated the last tear she could drop to his killer, then she held close the same old pillow which keeps secretly her dreams of happiness and hope…. and bled to death. The stabbing was fatal. She knew it was not worth begging, after all, for him it was nothing more than a cruel game of love.
She set out her journey as lonely as she should have always been, carrying in her heart the echoes of broken promises, of foolish dreams that she should have never allowed herself to have... .. and the last breath of love.

He left with bloody hands, without guilt, without remorse. So insensitive to the pain of the one he used to call "his wife." A good life waits for him, after all, nobody has ever heard of his master plan and soon someone else will fall into his power, another one will suffer in the end and he will smile again.

I met this woman, I saw love shining through her eyes, I saw her hope, I saw her suffering… I even envied her unconditional love.
I never understood her, but I have felt jealous of her happiness if could only share a second with him.

Do not feel sorry for her, I know she gave up her life for that love.
I do not hold a grudge against him, perhaps because I prefer to see him in the way she did… how big, how human, what a good friend he was in her eyes. She would have died anyway if he had gone away leaving her behind. By taking her life, he probably did her a favor.
Punishment? No, I won’t claim for punishment, why should I? If his mirror will remind him once and again what he did. Each time the woman invades his memory, the same dagger that killed her will bleed in his soul. When he remembers her smiling face, her voice, her manner of speaking, her body, her innocence, her deep love, punishment will come along. When a new woman touches his hand or hugs him, he will know that this new story was built on a foundation of someone else’s tears. The punishment will come with his memories, because memory has these things, it likes to come occasionally to harass your peace.

A woman died in the silence of her solitude.
She is survived by her side of mother and good friend, her woman side is long gone now.
I’ll miss her…..
Good bye.

As I was walking away I heard in the distance the reverberation of a song he used to sing for her…..

It's my Birthday!!

2008-11-18T09:30:00.003-02:00

Finally I turned 41 and I still think I'm a baby LOL and since you are my friends you have to say "yes you are, yes you are!!!!"
Kisses

Writing Project..... Proud Teacher!

2008-09-21T19:36:00.009-02:00

I think motivation is the door to make our students write, and blogging, one of the keys to open that door, so keeping that in mind, I encouraged my Pre Prof and THI students to create blogs and start writing. If it worked for me, why wouldn’t it work for them?
So, what you see here is the result of their first steps as bloggers:

Do Not Read My THI Blog

Pre Prof Writing Project

What I Am Needs No Excuses :)

2008-08-20T17:19:00.007-02:00

Being alone after 40 is not easy....being with someone just to run away from loneliness can be so knotty!!

I have to admit that as I grow older some of my habits have become little obsessions and obsessions are not the kind of things you can easily get rid of....to be honest, they are things I just don’t want to get rid of.

Let’s take for example my pillows. I have two and they are MINE, I don’t want to share one pillow, I need my two pillows or else I can’t sleep...or maybe I can, but they are mine.

(Yes, I know he can bring his own pillow, but what if it means he will stay longer than I wish? I really don’t want that)

My side of the bed, same thing! Why should I change sides if I love sleeping where I sleep? (Oh! so he sleeps on the right side of his bed, too? Then, go home and sleep there LOL)

At this point you might think I’m a witch, and perhaps I am, so refrain from reading what comes next because there is a huge chance you prove yourself right ha ha ha.

It took me a long time to learn I don’t have to please others all the time to make them happy if by doing so I am not. I used to have this crazy idea that people wouldn’t love me if I dared to contradict them. I was so afraid of being alone that many times I did things I didn’t want to do, or said things I didn’t mean or feel. The thing is that those who were meant to go away did it anyway, and there was nothing I could do to make them stay; hence, pleasing others for the sake of not being alone doesn’t work at all.

This fact brings me to the person I am today, my own special creation.

I met this guy long time ago, nice person I must say. Romantic, considerate, sweet. So far so good, right? Wait! let me re-read what I wrote...ermmm I must have said: way too romantic, annoyingly considerate and extremely cloying (not to mention hyper emotional)

Nice eyes, though.

Let’s go over one of our conversations:

(Situation 1: A Wednesday morning, we were going to spend the morning together and have lunch, but he couldn’t come)

Ringggg Ringgggg

Me: Hello?

Him: Hi, sniff.

Me: Hey. What’s wrong?

Him: I’m so sad I couldn’t go today.

Me: Well, don’t worry. We have many Wednesdays ahead.

Him: I know, but I feel miserable. I really wanted to see you. sniff. Aren’t you sad?

Me: Well, I’m not sad. I understand you couldn’t make it today.

Him: You aren’t? Oh, but I thought.... Why are you so mean with me?

Me: Uh?

I wasn’t mean. I wasn’t even rude! I was honest, which is not the same. What should I have said? Ohhhh baby, I’m so sad! I can’t live another minute without you!! I’m not a liar (as a matter of fact, it was great he didn’t come since I had so many things to do in the middle of the week)

I don’t want to be polite if politeness leads to give wrong expectations. I don’t need to answer questions I didn’t want to be asked in first place, and which put me at the edge of rudeness. Say what you want, but don’t ask me to replay. Please?

Help me here by choosing the correct answer::

1) I miss you. Do you miss me?

A) No (which makes me a bitch)

B) Yes (which makes me a liar)

C) I haven’t thought about it (which is a clear message I don’t have an answer)

D) Why do you ask this? (which means I don’t want to answer)

2) I love you. Do you love me?

A) Not at all (which makes me a bitch, but an honest one)

B) Yes (which makes me a liar)

C) I haven’t thought about it (which is a clear message I don’t)

D) Why do you ask this? (which means I don’t want to answer)

3) I planned to spend the WHOLE weekend with you, what do you think?

A) In your dreams! (I have a life, go get one for yourself. I need some rest)

B) Yes, I’d love it (lie, I will call it off later)

C) Well, not the 3 days. I’ve already made plans with my friends for Friday (which is true, though too devastating for him)

D) Why do you ask this? (which means I don’t want to answer)

4) From 0 to 10, how much do you love me? Miss me? Need me?

A) Well, let me think....... (any number but 10 will hurt him)

B) I think 5 (bring his pills)

C) I don’t think in terms of numbers (good excuse!)

D) Why on earth are you asking this girlie question? (which means I won’t answer a question that even a teenager wouldn’t ask. Grow up, ok?)

(Situation 2. Friday night. I’m having a great time with my friends who I haven’t seen in months!)

SMS 1: I’m thinking of you. (cute! Kiss)

SMS 2: I’m happy you are having a great time. (thanks, I really need my friends)

SMS 3: I miss you. I wanted to be with you. (we will be together tomorrow)

SMS 4: I wish you were here with me, but you preferred your friends :( (no answer)

SMS 5: WoW! You must be very entertained. Why don’t you answer? (because I’m with my friends and it is not polite to spend all my time with them answering your text messages)

SMS 6: I only wanted to be alone with you ok?. Sorry if that bothers you. (your behavior bothers me even more)

SMS 7: You don’t love me, do you? (no answer)

SMS 8: I think you didn’t get my previous txt. You don’t love me, do you? (I don’t)

SMS 9: You are so cruel!! (and you are so....)

SMS 10: so? What do you mean? (no answer, I’m not rude)

Some days after we broke up, he called me to say that many women would be thankful to have someone like him around. He also said he couldn’t understand why I wasn’t able to appreciate that the fact of having him in my life was a gift and I should be thankful. Shame on me!!

Should I answer?

First, I’m 40. I provide for my kids, I work more than 50 hours a week. I pay my bills (or not, but they are my bills). I clean my house and I cook. I’m educated, good friend, good person and not too ugly. People should be thankful for having met me! LOL

I’m sweet, romantic and considerate if I don’t get 1000 stupid text messages from a whining guy on a Friday night!

Why is it so wrong to act according to my will and not according to the others? Why if I don’t want to share my pillow, or if I don’t want to lie just to make others happy. Saying “I love you” is such a huge thing, and I only say it if I feel it.

It shouldn’t be so knotty, but it is. Being with someone again at my age to avoid loneliness could be a pain in the....neck.

By the way, I won’t try to escape solitude anymore. Being alone is so good sometimes..... However in my heart I know that one day the right one will come to my life, and that day I will give him my pillows, my side of the bed and my whole life. It's a matter of time.

Pre-Prof Wrinting Project

2008-07-24T13:37:00.004-02:00

Dear friends, my students are starting a new project and I'd love if you visit their blog and encourage them to write!!! xoxoxo

Please go to:

Pre-Prof Writing Project

Nuevo amanecer

2008-05-23T01:53:00.003-02:00

Roberto, para mi "Robby", es un buen amigo, que como muchos, encontré por casualidad en este mundo cibernético que es de mil maneras, tan importante para mi. El escribe bien bonito, asi que le pedi postear uno de sus poemas. Aqui se lo dejo para que lo disfruten aquellos que tienen la dicha de hablar mi lengua :)

Nuevo Amanecer

Frente a la inmensidad

De aquel azul mar

Que como un niño en su edad

Miraba las olas en su llegar

Justo allí sentí la necesidad

De esa sensación de Fe

Pude mi alma abrir

Pude con ella sentir

Pude con ella percibir

Tanto colores y emociones

Que junto a mi habitaban

Solo esto bastaba

Para comprender

Que quien nos creo

Jamás nos deja perder

La sensación de vida

Y esperanza

Que debemos sentir

Ya las horas fueron muchas

El sol se elevaba en su altura

Ya mi alma llena de dichas

Sentía la dulzura

De la creación a la cual pertenecía

Di gracias por el día

Y mil veces más por la vida.

Roberto Díaz (Puerto Rico,2008)

Ballad Of The Reflection

2008-05-03T01:31:00.004-02:00

Ever since I found this song I have felt that the one in the mirror is me. I’ve been there, and sometimes I’m still behind it, untouchable, unreachable, just looking how others come and go but never stay. I can make lives shine while they are in front of me, but then, I remain in this jail…… on the other side of the mirror, alone.

I have dreams and illusions I wish I could accomplish, but I’m not to be named after a while…..everything vanishes like bubbles.

Believe me, I have jumped out of this cold glass sometimes, and I’ve danced, and sung, loved…..and cried. Going out this reflection may give me five minutes of heaven and a whole life of sorrow. Sometimes I don’t know if I should stay or dare to run away. At least here, pain can’t reach me; tears never last to the following day.

Yes, I know it’s sad, but I know what it feels cleaning the mirror to get the best shines of the people before they leave and then just stay there longing for their coming back. It never happens and if it does, would it be the same?

(Modified from an e-mail I wrote some weeks ago)

***

I inhabit the interior of the mirror

where those who compose and pose for it will pause the time..

Immersed in my work, I clean the other side,

and this, my better cloth, what a brightness it can make.

***

From a pale old gold, to a sun whip,

from an discreet opaque to the later storm cloud

to play at my will as bee in the garden

of the moon of my endless mirror.

***

I keep in the enchanted room my main window

to a world that nobody comes to touch.

Country of the illusions, of the daydream and perhaps,

kingdoms that no longer are yearned to be named.

***

I know about the substances to make the dreams that will always be.

And I know the words that will wake them up.

I know to return over my steps looking after what is gone

or to fly there where I will never see.

***

Moon of my sad nights, moon of my vanity,

moon of my life, of intimate clarity,

device of the chance, mirror of my heart,

you taught me to see me from your prison.

***

I inhabit the interior of the mirror

where those who compose and pose for it will pause the time..

I know of my work, the one of playing in the time,

and my best cloth, what a brightness it knows how to do.

Pedro 4:8 ...... It must mean something ......

2008-04-20T18:54:00.008-02:00

If I look to the bottom of your tender eyes
my world and all its misery vanishes.
My world vanishes, and I discover heaven
when I dive in your tender eyes

Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes don’t desert me in plain air.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes, all my life for that dream.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes

If I forgot what is true,
if I went away from what it is sincere
your heavenly eyes would remind me it,
if I went away from what it’s true

Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes
don’t desert me in plain air.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes,
all my life for that dream.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes

If the sun that illuminates me
darkened one day, and a shadowy night got my life
your heavenly eyes would bright me up
your sincere eyes my path and my guide.

Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes
don’t desert me in plain air.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes,
all my life for that dream.
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes
Heavenly eyes, heavenly eyes

ThE BrOwN GuY

2008-03-21T18:51:00.004-02:00

I went to do some errands with Manuel some days ago, and since it was a sunny day I thought it would be a good idea to stop for and ice-cream. While Manu was enjoying his melting ice cream I started checking my grocery list… bread, milk, noodles and …..

- MOOOOOOOOM Why is that man brown?
- Well, because…..

I was trying to find the best answer when I heard:

- Hi brown sir! Manuel greeted.

OMG! Please earth, swallow me now, I thought. Why was he doing that? I was so embarrassed I couldn’t take my eyes from the list I had.

- Good afternoon little guy! The man answered laughing.

I really felt I had to apologize, so I looked at him and I said “I’m sorry, I don’t know why …….”

- “Don’t worry”, he interrupted me with a broad smile. “Maybe you haven’t noticed it, but I AM black”
- “You’re right” I said, and we both started laughing.

Here in Uruguay, where most of the inhabitants are from European decent, the Afro-Uruguayan community is very small, only 4% of our population, if I’m not wrong. For that reason, you can walk long blocks without seeing a black person around. At school, Manuel doesn’t have any Afro-Uruguayan classmate and when Sebastián went to school, he only had one Afro-Uruguayan partner in six years. So no wonder why Manu was so curious when he saw the man.

- “You are not back”. Manuel said. “You are dark brown”

Oh Noooo, here he goes again, I thought to my self. This time I didn’t say anything because….

- “That’s true”. The man answered laughing loudly. And, what color are you?
- I’m light brown.
- So, we are not very different. What do you think?
- Yes, we are……

I was just about to jump into the conversation when Manuel said…

- We are different because I’m a child and you are not. Why are you brown?
- Because my family came from Africa loooooong long time ago.
- When my mother buys a motorbike we will go to Africa.
- Oh, Good idea! It’s a beautiful country.
- Yeap. Good bye, I’m going to play now.
- Good bye

On our way home, I remained in silence thinking about the lack of integration we have with the Afro-Uruguayan community. It shouldn’t be this way. Black people have influenced our music, our culture, our whole country in so many good aspects…..

- Mom, when we go to Africa we can invite our friend from the park.
- Sure baby
- Yeap. Then we have to buy a car, because the motorbike is too small.

One Night Standing coming soon.

2008-01-31T18:33:00.000-02:00

I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to have this empty space by my side. I don’t want to wait for a phone call I won’t ever get. I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to cry…… I'm so tired.
How hard can it be to have someone who loves me? Will it be possible some day to receive a hug or two or three and be sure there will be a fourth?
Why is it nothing but just a dream for me to love someone, and to be loved?
Come on! What’s wrong with me? I’d love to know where I am failing.

I meet a guy, I believe in him, I think it might be him, he is not…,and all over again and again. I meet another guy…………he’s not.

Well, if being loving and nice doesn’t work, one night standing will.
Actually, it is more or less what most men want from me, so it won’t hurt if I behave the same way- heartless- just pure sex and that’s it, and then bye bye, so long aurevoir, arrivederci, adeu, sahionara, auf wiedersehen. Right?

Oh yes! You are so pretty. Can I see you?
Oh, sweety,how come you don’t have a boyfriend? You are gorgeous!
You are so funny, I love spending time with you.
Let me ease your heart. Trust me, please.

Blah blah blah, same old story, same results, same loneliness.
Just -Iwanttogetlaidwithyou- hidden men bullshit.

One night standing will probably work for me from now on. No harm done. No tears. No nothing.
I can manage that. I can be one step ahead, and say adieu before they do it.
I can also learn some nice and attracting lines to fool them.
Oh yes, I bet I can.

HaPpY HoLiDaYs :)

2007-12-23T13:55:00.000-02:00

Dear friends, I tried to make a nice card for you, so I spend a couple of hours copying and pasting images. Now that I see it finished, I have to admit that I'm not an artist LOL!!! Anyway, here it goes with all my love.
Hugs and kisses,
Ani

I'll be with my family in my home town for some days. I'll write a post as soon as I get here.

ShoRt sToRiEs

2007-12-17T11:58:00.001-02:00

I’ve always loved to read all kind of short stories. Better if they were written by a good friend of mine, who I happen to love a lot!
Let me talk a little bit about Jorge. He is the editor of the El Veraz, a weekly online newspage. I met him some years ago in the same chat room I met most of the “boricuas” who are my friends today. He’s not a Puerto Rican, but a Cuban living in the charming island of Puerto Rico. I particularly love my friendship with him because far from our characters in the chat, we have built a bond which is unknown to many people. We are good friends, and believe me, most of the chatters would show their open-moused surprise if they knew about it. Why? Well, it’s hard to explain if you are not part of that chat room…. Let’s say that his character there awakens all kind of feelings if you don’t know him beyond his nickname and what he writes in the room. I dared to meet him and now I’m proud of being his friend.
Here are two of his stories. I was considering the idea of translating them, but honestly I think I would take their nature away by doing so. I hope at least some of you can read them because they are great pieces of art.
Click on the images to read these two stories, my favorite ones.

Dia De Reyes

Divorcio a la Cubana

RALOS DE PISCINAS - EXIJA FISCALIZAÇÃO!

2007-12-17T02:19:00.001-02:00

This is a different kind of post. This time is all about Flavia. Please, click on the image to read her story. As her mother says SOZINHOS FICA DIFÍCIL, MAS JUNTOS, SOMOS PODEROSOS. For that reason, today, December 17th, many blogs will raise their voices to help and be by her side. Thank you people.

ThE CoNtEnDeR

2007-11-30T22:42:00.001-02:00

I’m sure you will recognize this beautiful melody from the reality show “The contender”. I love the two versions!

the_contender_guit...

the_contender_anta...

Well, yes, I do like boxing; however, my post is not related to physical fighting but to my little everyday struggling to be someone better, to accept myself just the way I am, to keep on going no matter what…..NO MATTER WHAT.
I’ve fallen so many times into the darkness that I have a tendency to ignore my ability to crawl back to the brightness. However, the truth is that I do survive after all. Once and again I come back to claim for my most treasured belongings, my life, my dreams, my hopes, my integrity, my smiles.
Once and again I fill myself with a renewed energy that comes from many people around me who never hesitate on giving me a hand, a word, a hug……a view to a new beginning.
Why does this melody brings so many thoughts to me? I see myself winning; getting through bad times, holding tightly the best trophy someone may deserve….another chance to be happy.
The music? Just the background sound of my life :)
Enjoy with me

2007-11-26T12:58:00.000-02:00

Life begins at 40 and at 5

2007-11-19T10:47:00.000-02:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

Well, I finally got there. I'm 40!! I was really scared of crossing the line, but what the heck! I woke up today being the same personI was yesterday..looking good (pardon my arrogance), feeling good and acting as a grown up child.
I had the best present ever!! My kids were by my side, I got many phone calls and cards and the best of all, my mom was here....what else can I ask for?

Thanks God for being always there. I love this picture!!

Manu had his birthday, too!!! It was on November 12th but we celebrated it last Saturday.

And that's all folks!
I wish you the best xoxoxox

No Voy a Mentirte

2007-11-09T14:04:00.000-02:00

A PhOnE CaLL, A SoNg AnD Me

2007-10-15T12:59:00.000-02:00

It’s been raining a lot lately. However, the sun finally showed up today and I’m struggling to switch my moody state to a more bearable one.
It gets really difficult to sit in front of this keyboard and try to put my ideas in order…..it’s been a long time since I was here the last time!!

My mom called me the other day and that was such a gift for me. Well, you may be wondering why it was so important. Her gift was a simple word….she said “Hello”.
It was her first phone call after the surgery!!! I must confess I dropped some tears of joy because I’m so proud of my mother.
We chatted for a while and I could understand almost all she said. Her tongue is still kind of numb and she has to learn how to pronounce certain letters such as L, N or R but she can speak very well considering all she had to go through.

Now, about me….. I’ve been working LONG LONG hours recently and honestly being in front of my pc was one of the privileges I had to give up for a while…..I repeat “for a while”. Soon everything will go back to normal and you will get to see more of me here again.
What can I tell you? Oh yes!! I gained soooooooooo much weight! Since I was out most of the day, my meals were nothing but sandwiches, hot dogs, and all sort of fattening things. Now I’m paying the consequences, sniff. My pants don’t fit anymore and I have to unbutton them if I want to sit comfortably. I comfort myself by thinking that I still have 2 months before summer. I have two options: either I lose this entire extra load or I’ll be using one of my”secret strategies" at the beach this year again (I hope with better results, though)

Now I will tell you about Felix….. He’s a good friend of mine. He’s a “Boricua” living in Switzerland who I met some years ago in a chat room of Puerto Rico. Some days ago he gave me this gift I really want to share with you all. He says he got inspired after one of our conversations and I only have words of gratitude after reading such beautiful words. Thanks FELIX!!!

I've been told that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Why am I here? This darkness... this silence...

time has finally stood still.

And my mind seeks you.

I wish to continue my journey,

but when I look back,

I see the light that I left behind.

I remember what has been,

your touch, your smell in my hands...

>>>I smell with my lips

I see with my hands

I touch with my mind

and I kiss with my breath<<<<

I seek things... I seek things that are to be found,

and at the same time will always remain a mystery.

Do you seek what I seek?

The mysteries of your eyes

I will seek but never understand.

>>>I smell with my lips

I see with my hands

I touch with my mind

and I kiss with my breath<<<<

How do you love a lifetime?

is this the time to continue my journey?

Can one love for such a long time?

Being in a place where time stands still comforts me.

I wish to stay here so that I can continue to love you.

"Time heals all wounds", they say...

I do not wish to be healed,

I wish to continue my suffering.

>>>I smell with my lips

I see with my hands

I touch with my mind

and I kiss with my breath<<<<

Will I ever smell you with my lips?

I do not know...

Will I ever see you with my hands?

I do not know...

In the distance, I will kiss you with my breath,

feel your skin and touch your soul

and even while being in this darkness,

I will see the light in your eyes!

Felix

Isn’t he sweet?
See you soon my friends. I love you with all my heart.

GoOd NeWs

2007-09-19T21:30:00.000-02:00

Dear friends, here I am with some good news!!

Last Monday my mother finally underwent surgery after so many days of struggling with her own fears, and our unrelenting efforts to make her change her mind.
She keeps on saying she did it for us and we keep on thinking Thanks God.
The doctor says she has to be positive and that we have to be strong to help her now when she needs us the most. Her recovery will take a long time, but now, after the surgery, time is something we can count on and we will be there by her side.
She lost half of her tongue; that means she won’t be able to pronounce some sounds for a while, maybe forever, but she will still be able to speak pretty well after speech therapy.

I have thought a lot about all your good wishes, about the prayer chains that some people I love set in motion, but above all I’ve been thinking of my dad, who secretly built a shrine in his tool shed and went every day to say a prayer for the love of her life. I can’t help feeling guilty because we were so into my mother’s problem that we forgot all about dad’s suffering. He must have felt so lonely and scared….
After the surgery, when mom was awake back in the room, she asked dad:” Do I look too horrible? And dad said “you look as beautiful as you did when I saw you for the first time”….and she does.

Well, that’s all about my mother for now, but I still have some other things I’d love to share with you.
I’m substituting for another teacher in a private institute so nowadays and for a whole month I’m working more than 12 hours per day! Imagine how I look when I get home at night….completely wrecked. However, this is a great experience for me and at the same time I’m opening a new door and increasing my salary (at least for this month) which is sooooooo good!!

Oh! I almost forget! I went to Buenos Aires last week to visit my friend. Remember? It was my first time there and my first time on a ship. I loved every single second of the trip. I got to Bs As on Saturday afternoon and he was waiting for me with a broad smile. He took me for a long ride around the city and then we had dinner in a beautiful restaurant. We talked for hours and hours……and hours! We had such a great time together. On Sunday we did pretty much the same, but in the afternoon we had to say goodbye and that hurt a lot. We will survive, though. This is a very thorny relationship, full of welcomings and farewells, but it worth living it while it lasts.

SoMe DaYs I sMiLe

2007-09-02T22:19:00.001-02:00

My mother has changed her mind!!!!!!!!!! She will finally go under surgery soon, probably in two weeks. I feel so relieved.
I know it's going to be difficult because it's not a simple surgery, but that's another story that our family will be ready to deal with when the moment comes. Together.

I was invited to a party on Saturday and I thought it would be good to go out and relax a little bit after so many days of preocupation. I put on some make up, I dressed up and I called a taxi. I was all glamour!
Well, I think I danced a little too much and now my left hip hurts and I can barely walk!! (Mariana should you come here, relax I'm still going to work!)

Today my kids came from their father's house and we play with the web cam, making faces and all kind of silly things. It was fun, what can I say? You know me, I'm a child of 40!

Well, I wanted to share this with you because I know you are praying and sending good wishes for my mom and us. Thank you my friends :)

I uploaded these two pictures from yesterday before leaving and today with my kids.

Please follow the instructions below:

Here you have to say: WoW what a gorgeous young lady ready to damage her hip!! Ouch!

Here you have to say: Awwwwwwwwww how sweet!!! (where did the young lady go?)
Aren't my babies cute? (Here you have to say: yesssssssssssssss)

And what about me? don't you think I look like their older sister? (Here please don't answerrrrrrr LOL)

I'm going to bed, it's cold and I'm sooooooooo tired!!

Love and hugs to all

DiFFiCuLt TiMeS

2007-08-26T18:47:00.001-02:00

These days have been so hard for all the family. The doctor told my mother that it’s useless to go under radiotherapy again because if the tumor had come back after only 8 months, it’s likely it will appear later for a second time. The other alternative was surgery. Drastic? Yes, but probably more effective.
My sister was with my mother when the oncologist explained the procedure and my mother seemed to understand. Well, she didn’t.
Some days after the appointment she went to see her other doctor, who explained again how the surgery was going to be, and it was only then that my mother realized what she was going to go through. The doctor was very tactful but he couldn’t convince my mother and now she refuses the treatment.
We are all trying to convince her, but no matter what we say, her answer is always the same….I would die right now if I could.
I guess she’s in denial. I hope she changes her mind and starts fighting against this f*cking thing.
She is visiting the doctor again tomorrow, let’s see what happens.
I love my mom so much…………..

I will be visiting you all as soon as I have some free time.
Thank you very much for your patience and your lovely comments.
You light up my life

HeRe AgAiN

2007-08-12T16:38:00.000-02:00

Returning after such a long time seems to be harder than I thought it would be. A lot of water has passed under the bridge. I’ve drifting through busy days, complicated relationships and mom’s illness…and somehow the flow brought me back here one more time. I guess that I needed some pampering.

Mom is not doing well and she has to face a whole week of radiotherapy again. She is so afraid, all of us are actually, but we try not to show it for her own good.

I won’t be allowed to visit her during her treatment because for safety reasons only people older than 45 can enter the room. My sister will be with her…I wish I could too.

Dad has been aging very fast. He wants to be strong for mum, but they’ve been together for more than 50 years and seeing my mother sick is overwhelming him too much.

On a much lighter note, remember the story of my boyfriend from my youth? He has come many times from Argentina and soon I will visit him too. I don’t know… it will take time until we decide what to do with our lives, meanwhile I think it’s a good idea to seize the day and let time do the work. As you can see, my heart has chosen the third flame and I can do nothing but follow his commands beyond the outcomes it may bring.

Dear friends I haven’t deserted you. You are always on my mind and in my heart and you will always be there. I love you so so so much.

When I was a very little child my mother taught me to pray to my guardian angel. I wonder if he or she is still around. Just in case I’ll say the prayer now for my mom, for you all and for myself.

XOXOXOXO

Ani

Ángel de la guarda,

dulce compañía

no me desampares

ni de noche ni de día.

Las horas que pasan,

las horas del día

si tu estas conmigo

serán de alegría.

No sueltes mi mano,

sé en todo mi guía,

sin ti soy chiquito

y me perdería.

Ángel de la guarda,

dulce compañía

no me desampares

ni de noche ni de día.

WhIsPeRs By ThE FiRePlAcE

2007-05-26T17:55:00.000-02:00

Hello my friends! Long time no see! Well, I'm doing fine, but my PC isn't LOL! Thanks to a good friend I was able to publish this post so that you know I'm still alive.
I wrote this story below and I uploaded it as an image...why? There's someone I know who doesn't know English and he won't be able to translate it easily this way he he he.
Remember I love you thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much. I'll be back as soon as my soulmate, I mean, my pc gets over this trance.
Please, click on the image to read.....yes, now I hear voices :)

Have a nice weekend!!!!!!!!!!

WhAt aN ArTiSt!

2007-05-10T13:32:00.000-02:00

Hi everybody!! Today I won't be posting anything too personal; actually this post is not about me at all. As you may know, I'm an EFL teacher, and for that reason, I have the chance to meet a lot of wonderful people. Sadly, it’s not always possible for me to know what my students do, are or dream when they go home.
This post is about Lucia a.k.a LuMaGa. She told me at the beginning of the year that she loved drawing, so I said “Great! You will be an excellent artist one day” (she is so young)
Yesterday in class, we talked again about her drawings and I told her I would love to see some of them. Today she sent me an email with a link to her page. What!!!???? “You will be an excellent artist one day???? This girl is already an AMAZING ARTIST and she in only 18!!!
Please, visit her page to see how gifted she is. I adored all her drawings; I’m sorry, I should have said “pieces of art”

Click on the drawing to visit her page:

WaTcH OuT ThE GeNtLe WiNd

2007-05-08T11:25:00.000-02:00

(click on the picture to enlarge)

By the way,Manuel started school in the morning and he is still having problems to get up early because he doesn’t want to go to bed or sleep when he has to. I think I’ll learn this song, because the ones I know are not working!!
I love this video, it’s so cute…..enjoy!

(updated) cLoSiNg CiRcLeS

2007-05-02T01:42:00.000-02:00

"It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn't matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over." - The Zahir

I don’t know exactly why I chose that quote to start my post today. Maybe it’s my need of doing what I have to do, but without knowing how, or worst, knowing, but not daring.
We have talked before about walking through new paths and opening awaiting gates….but, what about closing the ones we left behind?
I’ve learned so far that if those doors remain opened, the echoes of what went before follow us just some steps away, they puff in our neck…..and one day, they hunt us.

My phone rang and I heard “I’m 10 km away and 22 years later”. I left the house and went walking to the route….I was about to see my past coming back.
I stood at the bus stop, legs shaking, heart in the neck, and hands rubbing together…”what am I going to say!!”
A car stopped, the window went down and a man says “Excuse me, have you seen a chubby girl around here?” I started laughing, my legs got firm again and I said, “Yes, I think she was waiting for a thin guy with curly hair”. He opened the door, got off the car and we hugged very tight for a long while.
It was a sunny afternoon and we went to the beach, we sat on the sand facing the ocean and watching seagulls. We talked, talked and talked for hours; I think we pretty much covered these 22 years. There was plenty of laughter and stories….and then a long silence preceding the question “Why did we drift apart?” We couldn’t find an answer because the last thing I remember is that we loved each other a lot…….life is life.
Through the years I’ve thought many times about him, every Christmas time, every presidential election, when people return en masse to their home town, I’ve asked if someone had seen him, but I never got a positive answer.
He asked about me too, I never knew it until today.
I’ve met many people in my life, and I’ve experienced all kind of deep feelings, however, he was the only one who left this lasting curiosity inside me. I needed to know about him. I’m sure now; I needed to close the circle.
It was 5 o’clock…we stood up, and took a walk along the shore; he had to be at the airport at 7, time was against us and there was so much to say…odd as it may sound, we walked in silence. We stopped walking and an anticipating look passed our faces….we hugged again and for a second, all those years seemed to vanish. We were the same kids from the past.

If we are going to see each other again? Probably. If something will happen? I guess not. He has his life there; I have mine here, and long distance relationships are not meant to be. That I know. But I also know that this encounter was good for both of us, we owed each other a conversation, and we owed each other closing the circle.

He called me from Buenos Aires some minutes ago, he was driving his car and thinking that maybe, just maybe his feelings are still alive….I told him that maybe I felt the same, just maybe.
He turned the music on and dedicated this song to me….
and I dedicated this one for him.... then we hung up.

Well, that’s all for today. I thought you would like to know…..
I’m still too busy in my job, but I’ll come back soon.

Oh! By the way, he doesn’t look like the picture I posted before. LOL

I found this and I though it would be nice to share it with you all

OMG!!! (Tuesday update: HAPPY BIRTHDAY RUTH!!!!)

2007-04-16T13:52:00.000-02:00

When I was youngER, LOL, I met this boy. He was my boyfriend for some months when I was 17. He used to live in Buenos Aires; he still lives there actually, so we would see each other every other month. With the time, of course we drifted apart and I never saw him again. I’ve always had good memories about our time together, though.
Ana Claudia, who is my cousin, works in the migration office, and guess what? She saw him some days ago when he was traveling to Uruguay for business. In fact, she has seen him many times because he comes to Montevideo and Punta del Este very often, but this time was different because, out of nothing, SHE GAVE HIM MY PHONE NUMBER!!!!! Then she called me laughing and said: “You won’t believe what I did, please don’t kill me!!”
I said “&%/$#” OMG!! What if he thinks I told her to do so? What if he thinks I’m desperate and lonely? (Well, I am, LOL, but he doesn’t have to know!!!)
After some minutes I calmed down and thought to myself, “he won’t call anyway” and I forgot about the whole thing (but I do remember to kill Ana Claudia next time I visit her he he he)
Well, it was Saturday night, around midnight when my phone rang; I looked at the screen to see the number and it said “private number”, which is what I get when someone form abroad calls me…..IT WAS HIM!!!!
I gave him a very shy HI and he told me…”HI? What do you mean by HI? No no, you have to say “heyyyyyyy, how is my first love doing!!” or “ WoW, this is the best surprise I ever had!!”
I started laughing, and he laughed with me, the rest of the conversation went smoothly, as if we had spoken just a few days before……but 22 years have passed since our last conversation.
He’s coming to my country again on April 28th and he wants to see me… and I’d love to see him, too. Wait!!!!!!!!! Have I just said 22 years??? Oh Nooooooo, where is my make up? My push-ups, my “keepeverythinginplace panties” my snail dribble cream!!! (kidding about THIS one LOL)
I hope he has gone bald, or lost his teeth, please something!!!
Well, you know me I’M JOKING. Those 22 years have passed for both of us, so who cares? I’m more interested in knowing about how he is doing in life and many other things related to the man he is and not the way he looks now. BUT, just but, if he looks like this: I wouldn’t mind he he he.
Well, that’s all folks. I have to cook something and prepare my classes for this afternoon.
See Ya!!
Xoxoxoxoxox

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RUTH!!!!

GeTTiNg oLd :(

2007-04-15T15:08:00.000-02:00

Oh noooooooooo!!! I’m getting old at the speed of light!!
What’s going on? Maybe I need to take some vitamins, for I’m still too weak after the flu. I feel healthier though, but if I walk or try to do something at home I get tired and I have to sit down. I used to get better faster in the past, sniff.
Tomorrow morning I have to work, so I think I will get up early, take a long shower and put some (a lot of) make up on this pale face I have now. Actually, now that I think about it, I haven’t worn any make up in weeks… I’m getting old AND lazy!!!!
Well, changing the topic….. Yesterday we had a beautiful morning here and I decided to spend some time in my front yard to enjoy the sun and the warm air. I was having some “mates” and thinking about Ruth, so I sent a txt telling her, among other things, how nice the weather was. I think that no longer than 15 minutes after the sky went grey and we had a huge electric storm that lasted until midnight or more.
I turned off the TV and the modem because of the lightening and I spent part of the afternoon sitting by the window and looking at the spectacle. I love storms when I don’t have to go outside.
I was getting bored when I remembered that there were other things to do with the PC beyond surfing the net, LOL, so I opened my jigsaw program and put my patience, my eyes and my brain into motion. Take a look:

I played for HOURS and when I went to bed I continued seeing the pieces everywhere, on the walls, on the floor, on the roof ahhhhhhhhhhhh. That had happened to me before, when I used to play TETRIS in my son’s “family game” (and I won’t mention the music of Mario!!!)
We have another grey day today so I guess I’ll have another jigsaw puzzle session and later I’ll visit All the blogs.
I love you ppl xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxooxoxoxooxooxoxoxoox

WiTh ThE fLu

2007-04-10T00:48:00.000-02:00

Dear Friends, something strange happened to the webpage where the virtual card was located!! It was soooooooo beautiful grrrrrrrrrrrrr
People, I'm in bed with fever right now :( . I got up only to check my inbox but I can't be up long because all my body aches, snifffff.
I'll come back assap.
Love and more love, Ani

Please, the ones who couldn't see the card, please go to http://www2.postalespv.com/english/create.php?card_id=707, it's really inspiring

FeLiCeS PaScUaS

2007-04-08T14:25:00.000-02:00

<a href="http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash">Get Macromedia Flash Player NOW!</a>

Postales Virtuales

Para todos mis amigos....especialmente para Ruth

FaRewEll Mick.... fLy HiGh

2007-04-07T13:25:00.000-02:00

Yesterday night a friend I never met in person, but I loved with all my heart, passed away. Ruth, his wife, let us know about his life, his dreams, his dask and now his dawn.
Many people learned to love Mick, all over the world there’s now sorrow, but also there’s joy for we had the chance to meet a man through the heart of this wonderful woman.
I feel we were given a gift that we will treasure all our lives.

This is the only thing I can say right now:

If I leave before you do, if I leave you in these lands
Don’t be afraid of the night for I live in it.
If I leave before you do, if it’s that ways that is set out
I want that your news speak of air and sun.
I want you to always remember what we said one day
That every time you laugh I laugh with you my love.
And don’t forget something that is guessed in life
And it’s that life itself it's a miracle of love.
If I leave before you do and I visit your silence
It’s not to see you sad, nor to see your pain.
I want to tell you, with these clumsy words
That every time you cry, my heart will know.
And we will never meet for I was always by your side,
to where and until when…. those are God’s things.
And we won’t find each other for I was always by your side

In aNy WaY

2007-04-05T16:03:00.000-02:00

.............Cuando hay un abismo desnudo

Que se opone entre los dos

Yo me valgo del recuerdo taciturno de tu voz

Y de nuevo siento enfermo este corazón

Que no le queda remedio más que amarte

Y en la distancia te puedo ver

Cuando tus fotos me siento a ver

Y en las estrellas tus ojos ver

Cuando tus fotos me siento a ver................

It'S So DaMn HaRd

2007-04-04T15:36:00.000-02:00

I came across this poem when I was looking for some material I needed for my classes.
For most of you, who speak English, this could be just a poem, for me it was nothing but a nightmare!!
I’ve tried hard to remember the wicked teacher who had us repeating this poem once and again, but I wasn’t lucky. Who was she?
Now, since I don’t want to be forgotten, I decided to make some adjustments in my following class planning, and instead of teaching some grammar I’ll be teaching pronunciation he he he. (This is a very evil laughing) …..
Oh! I have an idea!!! I’ll dictate it, and then I can assess spelling, too!
Planning is so good sometimes!!
Come on people; don’t think “that” about me, I’m just trying to do the best for my students! Wouldn’t you do the same thing for them?

The Poem (repeat after me LOL)

I take it you already know
Of tough and bough and cough and dough?
Others may stumble, but not you,
On hiccough, thorough, laugh and through?
Well done! And now you wish, perhaps,
To learn of less familiar traps?
Beware of heard, a dreadful word
That looks like beard and sounds like bird,
And dead: it's said like bed, not bead --
For goodness sake don't call it 'deed'!
Watch out for meat and great and threat
(They rhyme with suite and straight and debt).
A moth is not a moth in mother,
Nor both in bother, broth in brother,
And here is not a match for there
Nor dear and fear for bear and pear;
And then there's dose and rose and lose --
Just look them up -- and goose and choose,
And cork and work and card and ward,
And font and front and word and sword,
And do and go and thwart and cart --
Come, come, I've hardly made a start!
A dreadful language? Man alive!
I'd mastered it when I was five!

Anonymous

StUbBoRn

2007-03-31T04:16:00.000-02:00

It’s been raining a lot lately and I haven’t done much with my life…. just going to work and coming back home day after day. Today I got off work at ten in the morning like every Friday, and since it was raining cats and dogs I stayed inside my house all day long.

I saw the night was coming so I told Sebastian to go with me to the grocery store before it was too late. I’m afraid of walking alone at night in this town, because the streets are dark and I hate the croaking of the frogs coming from the ditches along the path.

We bought some things and retuned home trying to avoid the 100000 potholes that decorate our streets. It’s not that the mayor of the city doesn’t care about repairing the streets; the truth is that he wants our town to resemble the moon, full of craters, to make us feel we are in heaven. Clever guy, ah?

Back home, I was about to open the front door when I saw this little monster working very hard to rebuild her net.

Today, yesterday, and the day before, this tiny and stubborn spider has been trying to set her web in my door. The problem is that the only thing “she” catches is ME when I try to go out.

I can’t believe how obstinate she is!!! Well, possibly, it’s not the same spider; nevertheless, for sure it’s a relative LOL.

I’m going to wait a couple of hours to see if the web is ready and then I’ll take another picture….that if I don’t forget about it and the web ends all over my face AGAIN!!!

Have I told you how much I hate spiders? Well, I hate them A LOT. It doesn’t matter if they are big or small; they are all horrendous monsters that scare the hell out of me. You could perfectly say I’m arachnophobic, for when I see one either I get paralyzed or I overkill the enemy with whatever I have at hand. So, why on earth am I taking pictures of this one? Aha! That’s because I’m trying to face my phobia, that’s the new trend, isn’t it? I read it here and here

I also saw it on TV, but mostly I’m doing it because I’m bored and I have nothing else to do he he he.

Well, time to go. I want you to know I’m doing fine. I’ve missed you more than you can possibly imagine. I appreciate that you have stayed around all the time I was gone.

It is true when I say you are more than gifts to my soul.

Love you

UPDATE ( 3hours later)

Oops! I think I shouldn't have touched it.... LOL

UPDATE
Life is so strange sometimes……

While a friend of mine wants her son back from war, another of my friends goes voluntarily to a hostile land as a member of the UN. Different place, different reason, and perhaps, different outcome, but still an unfair and cruel war that shouldn’t exist.
This is my friend Tato, one of my former English students and a good friend now.
He left in February to Ethiopia and he will be there at least for six months, probably for one year. I miss him a lot because we used to talk very often and most of all, because we used to laugh together a great deal.
I don’t know why I hadn’t mentioned this before in my posts, but since today I finished with his blog, I though it was a good moment to tell you about him.

Have a nice weekend people. I'm visiting you tomorrow :)

HaStA LuEgO

2007-03-20T15:43:00.000-02:00

I won't be posting for a while. Remember I love you. Please don't forget about me ok?

You are all in my heart

Feel free to send some e-mails from time to time

analiagm@hotmail.com

SuNdAy'S DiScOvErIeS

2007-03-19T15:06:00.000-02:00

After all the raining we had on Saturday, it was really good to wake up on Sunday and see the sun shining again. I went to the lake, as usual, and I took my beach chairs with me. I sat under some huge eucalyptus and had a few Mates there…very relaxing!!

Then I started to look around and I noticed that many wild flowers had bloomed and that some plants had grown a lot lately, so I went back home, grabbed the camera and took some pictures.

It was getting late and I hadn’t cooked anything for lunch, so I said bah bye to the lake and hello to the kitchen. I prepared some “empanadas” (for homework, please go to wikipedia and get some information about that food) Oh, I’M SORRY!!! You are not my students LOL
The thing is that I needed some parsley to add flavor to my meat, so I went to my backyard to get some. SURPRISE!! I have NO idea how this plant got there, but under the parsley I found this!! I took the picture because I may not know how it got there, but I do know where it will end mmmmm.

A Pumpkin?? Yeahhhhhh

Well, I have to go....dinner is ready. Would you like an EMPANADA?

Note: have a glass of water VERY close to you LOL

Love you all guys!

fRiDaY / SaTuRdAy uPdAtE

2007-03-16T15:16:00.000-02:00

I’m a lady, so I spent some moments just thinking how to say this nicely. Well, I finally came to this conclusion….there’s no polite way, so here it goes:

Get the F*ck out of my blog!!!
No, this is not for you my friends, you are always more than welcome to come, comment and express yourselves; this is your house, too.
Let me put it this way, everybody who comes here regularly knows what I’ve been through. You know about my suffering, my tears and my desperate urgency of going on with my life.
Now, what if I told you that THAT person or his “allofasuddenwifeandmotherofhisnewbornchild” is coming secretly to my blog to check what I’m doing with my existence?
Well, he/she is doing that. How do I know it? I have many friends in Puerto Rico, and when I say “many” I mean it. That’s how I finally found out the truth he refused to tell me…. I still don’t know why he decided to act so maliciously….anyway….
The fact is that when I felt I was ready to face the truth, it took me two seconds to get the answer. Like it or not, he is surrounded by many people I know well and who love me…they didn’t want to see me crying so they went out to check what was going on, hence, I knew it immediately. Same thing now, checking ip is easy if you have friends who can prove where the connection comes from. I got you, now leave me alone!!
Both of you: Check this list, if you please:
My life
What I do
What I don’t do
What I want
If I cry
If I have someone in my life or I don’t
If I’m coming or going
If I’m happy or sad
If I hate you
All of these and more…

************IT’S NOT YOUR BUISNESS****************
***Don’t you dare to come here again. Show some respect to yourself***

That being said, I’ll go on with my post, which is by far more important than wasting my time with him or her…or both? Who knows….

These days I’ve been outside a lot. The only idea of the coming Fall makes me want to seize each moment I have to enjoy the sun. I don’t like cold days!!
I took some low quality pictures, but I’d love to share them with you. Take a look. (I don't know how to change the date in my camera!! the real date was Thursday 15, 2007)

Can you see the hummingbird? They come everyday to my hibiscus. I love them, so tiny, so fast.
After having a sip, the little bird had a one-second rest on the electricity wires.

But they aren’t the only ones that come to my flowers…..

If you look carefully you’ll see a bumble bee inside the flower. Yes, you may be saying “big deal, a bumblebee” There are millions of pictures of them….well, but not a picture of the one that got angry with me and followed all the way home!!!

Manuel is afraid of bees, so he stayed inside just in case…

This is HiFi, my cat. While I was trying to capture the hummingbird, he was fighting with a ghost LOL. I could never get to see what he was afraid of.

Later that afternoon Manuel told me there was a gift for me over the table, so this is what I found….

So sweet!!! Oh oh my hibiscus!!!!!!!!!!!

Ruth, would you invite him to your garden? LOL

In the afternoon, it started to rain and if there is something that we, Uruguayans do when it rains it is eating "Tortas Fritas"

The last picture goes for AUDS
(a wink with love)

It’s Friday!!! And tonight I’m going dancing with some friends. I hope to have fun and......

AbSoLuTeLy SoAkInG WeT (SaTuRdAy UpDaTe)

I went dancing last night and I had a really good time with some friends. I came home around 8 am, so you can imagine how sleepy I am now. It doesn’t matter at all…I should do it more often.
It’s been raining the whole afternoon and I had planned many outdoors activities for today. Bad luck, now I’m staying indoors…let’s see what I can do behind these walls. Oh!! I know!! I’ll take a nap…..39 + 8am= WORN OUT WOMAN…but with a smile on my face, ohhhhhhhh yesssssssssss. Nobody can take it away!!
Talking ‘bout rainy days……

Most of you met me under a heavy rain, remember? Sad days that now are fading for good... In thosee days my soul was wet for all the tears I shed and I felt everything was going down…..something like this:

And then even worse…

But now the rain is getting lighter…. and warmer and I feel like….

Though, to be honest, I’d like this better yessssssssssssssssss

NiCe SuNdAy EvErYwHeRe

2007-03-12T00:43:00.001-02:00

I went around some blogs some minutes ago and I could see this weekend was in general really good. Some friends were painting the town orange; another friend got some winks…nice!! And me? Well, my weekend, in particular today, was beautiful.
It was a warm autumn day. Yes, I know fall hasn’t started yet, but the color of the sun, the air, everything says it is coming very fast.
Damian and I went to the lake early in the afternoon. We took the boat, the camera and some food and drinks to have a sort of improvised picnic. We also took some bread for the geese, but there were many people feeding them so we saved it for tomorrow.
Seba and Manu didn’t want to come with us, so we spent some time alone rowing and chatting a lot. Actually, he rowed….I just sat in the boat and enjoyed the ride.
I think we spent more than two hours in the water and another two on the shore, just sunbathing and having “mate”.
We came home after dusk. If I hadn’t had to cook, I would have stayed longer.
Now it’s almost midnight and we finished dinner some minutes ago. It doesn’t matter because I wish this Sunday lasted a little more.
I’m coloring my hair borgonia!!! I tell you later how it went. Hugs and Kisses for everyone.

SoMe GoOd ThInGs Do HaPpEn

2007-03-10T16:51:00.000-02:00

I have been through difficult times lately and yesterday night I finally knew the whole truth. If it hurt me? Too much indeed. However, I won’t waste my time tumbling on my misery and making all that pain grow more than I can stand. The only thing I’ll say is that I know now that all my tears of the past days and the ones yet to come are something he didn’t deserve at all. Not even one of them.

Let me tell you about the good things.
Classes started last week and everything went right. The first day of class I was a little nervous because for the first time in a long time I had to teach a group quite big, 20 students. Last year my groups had no more than 10 students each. I was also jumpy because last year I taught only beginners and now I have to teach people who are taking international examinations. I was/am afraid of having lost most of the language because I didn’t have the chance of practicing it as I should have.
Anyway, the class was nice and I left the room pleased but really tired.
When I got home I kissed my kids, prepared dinner and when they went to bed I sat in front my PC to check my emails and the blog. Surprise!!! I had a message from one of my students saying he had enjoyed the class a lot, that it was “Analia’s style” and that I was the best. Nice ah? I know I’m not the best, but it was a rewarding and flattering remark. After that, a student I had last year called me and asked if I could be his teacher again because he doesn’t understand a word his new teacher says LOL. His teacher is my co-worker and I know he’s real good!!! But in general, beginner students tend to view through rose-tinted glasses the first teacher they have. It happened to me long time ago; I remember with love my first English teacher, she means a lot to me even today.
Those are some of the good things that happened to me regarding my work.
Now, about my kids. Sebastián started his 3rd year in high school last week, and he seems to be very motivated. His mood has changed a lot, but from time to time he forgets all the teenager behavior and hugs me tight. Nice!! He has always been very sweet.
And Manu? I’m still waiting an answer from a school to see if he can enter. I hope he can because being at home all the time is not the best for him at his age.
Today he woke me up with a kiss on my nose and whispered, “Mum, you look like and angel when you sleep” Awwwwwww!! Isn’t he adorable? Of course he continued by saying, “can I have my breakfast now?” I had to get up very quicky, good moments don’t last forever, but I had a big smile on my face the whole morning.

Ah! And Dami is coming today from Durazno. It’s been three weeks since the last time I saw him. I hope we both have a good time.

I love you all

MaGiC NiGhT iN Plumpiemousie

2007-03-08T11:33:00.000-02:00

Last night Manuel was invited to a land of colors and joy. Some good friends were there on the shore waiting to pick him up.
It was a long journey, so Manu took and apple and sailed away.
It was a starry night in Plumpiemousie and I guess he and his friends had a very good time together playing for hours under the moon.
I didn’t notice he had left because in the morning he was back home sleeping in his bed.
Now he’s standing by my side with a broad smile….he must be thinking about the wonderful time he spent with these particular friends. I know he wishes to go someday again.

Here you can see a picture of last night. Enjoy it because it’s a piece of art.

Love you all
Thank you Mousie

PaCkInG… fOr BeTtEr Or WoRsT

2007-03-04T17:50:00.000-02:00

It’s been a rainy weekend so I decided to do something I have procrastinated for some days. Not an easy task I confess, but necessary if I am to start walking to my new beginning.
I don’t have many touchable things to pack from him, but I have my pc full of images, msn logs, writings or emails from or for him that appear in front of my eyes whenever I’m searching for something else. Too aching.
So, what’s first? The pictures. I’ll store them in a cd and erase them from here….then? I guess I can put the rest of the things in the same cd…..it’s important to keep things together, isn’t it?
Now, the touchable objects….. 7 things I won’t ever wear….in a box.
His only love letter? Let me see….not in my purse…where then? Ok, I’ll get an envelope and I’ll put it in the same little box with the other 7 elements.
The chain with the cross….. No, I can’t get rid of it, that would cause more pain than relief….I’ll keep it till the day I….well, I’ll keep it and that’s it.
Next….Oh yes, let me erase his phone number from my cell phone and his email address from my messenger…..done.
I wish I could pack my memories as well….my feelings…my dead dreams….my love, but they are already stored in my heart and there’s no way to let them go, though I wish I could…. I wish I could…. I wish I could.

The Way of the World

2007-03-03T22:43:00.000-02:00

I got a special gift today, a gift that touched my soul in many ways. That made me think that there’s always a gift behind a gift, it only takes to see what you are given not with your eyes but with your heart. The poem he gave me carries more than meaningful words; it is filled with love and understanding, and with his never-ending capacity of reaching my soul and driving away my sadness and my uncertainty.
Some days ago, I wrote something about my inability to decide which path I should take to go on with my life, he read it and he knew he had something to share with me.
The gift started not with the poem itself but with him looking for it inside many boxes he had kept closed for some time. It continued with him spending time on typing it, and finished with the invaluable act of sharing a piece of his heart with me, just a friend.
He wrote this poem long time ago for one of the most important people in his life….now those words are with me and I’ll treasure them forever. Can you see the gift behind the gift?
Thank you so much Stewart. I must have done something good in life to deserve a friend like you.

The Way of the World

Said the gate to the path:
“Do you go or do you stay?”
And the path replied:
“I think I must pass and move on,
For I am un-used, untrodden and lonely.
Please let me pass”.

Now the gate, though upright, proclaimed with humility:
“I have not the power to restrain you, nor to let you by,
since I face two directions
And thus owe two allegiances”.

So the path asked:
“Can you not use the power of vision that is yours
To tell me about the other side, so that I might find
The way home?”

And now the gate answered:
“On the other side, you will encounter
What you already know; the life you have chosen,
That was chosen for you.
A path is a path. It runs and meanders where it must.
At times, it crosses other paths.
They merge, they part and on they travel,
Searching out their ways.
If there is an end, I know it not,
For I am only a simple gate, a passage for paths,
Without omniscience, or omnipotence”.

And the path, pensive, looked up at the gnarled old gate and,
Feeling humbled, murmured:
“But how do I cross, in order to run and meander
And merge and part?
For am I not a path, as other paths?
Or am I condemned to an eternal waiting at the gate,
Solitary?”

At this, the gate uttered swiftly, though without urgency:
“Hush now. I hear footsteps approaching from yonder.
In the instant of your opportunity,
Will you have the wisdom to make the most
To choose?
Or the folly to miss all there is
By being ensnared in vacillation, lost
In futile questioning?

The life you have is yours alone to live.
To live it, you must
Follow your own path”.

And with that, as the gate was pushed open

(Stewart, to all those in search of certainties.
August 1991)

I AiN't MiSsInG YoU At aLL

2007-02-27T23:16:00.000-02:00

I’ve been walking along a path of shadows and dull lights ever since I felt he was walking away. That’s how I got to this bifurcation where I’m standing frozen, unable to take a step and trying to make a connection between my heart and my mind, the reason and the emotions…. I wonder if it will be possible any time soon.
Which path should I take? He is long gone and I know I must go on with my life, but then, the path to forgetfulness may be too rough, too painful, and too long. I’ve been into this love for so long that letting it go now makes me tremble with fear. I’m still carrying a heavy load in my heart… all my memories, my expectations and broken dreams. Would I leave behind part of this aching burden as I walk to my future? Would it be always with me as a reminder of what it couldn’t be? I wish I could find the answer.
The other path it’s just a roundabout which will take me to the place I am now…completely alone, loving an impossible and dreaming dreams that no longer belong to me; however, it’s a path I know very well, I know where each stone stands and where the bends become more dangerous….. it will hurt, but it’s a pain I’m used to living with.
Perhaps I should stay still for a while…I may not ready to go anywhere yet.

Now, about my days in Durazno. I had such a good time there! We went to the Calls Parade, we got together with friends, we walked to the camping site to see the groups preparing the drums for The Calls and then Dami and I chatted for hours and hours, we had so much to catching up with that the morning seemed to have broken sooner than ever. Have I told you he’s living almost alone in the middle of the country side and I’ve been alone for more than two years? Boy, we really needed to talk!!! (I imagine Ruth’s face when reading this LOL, behave girl!)
I was about to become sad because I had to come back home when Dami got a phone call saying he didn’t have to work until Tuesday, so he decided to come to my place for some days…he left yesterday night.
I really like having him around, but you should have seen my son’s eyes when he saw Dami.
- Can he stay to play with me? Can he? Can he? Pleaseeeeeeeeee?
Damian has always spent long hours playing with Manu. Every time he’s here, Manuel monopolizes him and Dami lets him do it with so much love. I’ve heard him whispering “I love you Manu” when taking him to sleep in his arms and I know he really does.
On the other hand, Sebastian, my older son, enjoys when Dami comes too. Why? Because he prepares BIG meals that only they can finish!!! And because he takes side with Seba against me to make him laugh and to make me angry….. I enjoy all that parody, we all do.

Going back to the paths…though I laughed a lot all these days and I felt loved and less lonely, this experience also made me realize that I’m not ready to leave my love story behind no matter how much I need to.
I had all the time the sour feeling of being unfaithful to Uriel. I know I wasn’t. There’s no longer a relationship to respect, but still, my heart and my mind are disconnected and my heart seems to rule.
What do you think? Should I take the first step to a new life? Should I forget? Will I be able to do it?

The song today is what I feel inside….but it’s a secret between you and I : )

CoMiNg SoOn!!!!

2007-02-26T00:35:00.000-02:00

GoInG To ThE CaLLs

2007-02-16T12:19:00.002-02:00

Today I’m leaving to Durazno at midnight. It’s gonna be a hard day for me since I have to clean the house, cook, take a 30-minute ride to buy the tickets, tell my neighbor (not the ugly one) to take care of my pets, go to work, come home and work with a private student for another hour, prepare my backpack, take a shower and take the bus to the bus station and then take the bus to Durazno. Ahhhh I’m already tired!!!
Well, I’ll have time to rest once I get there around 2:30 am…..REST?
My friend Damian is getting to Durazno around the same hour, because right now he’s working in the middle of the country side. He’s been there alone for a whole month, which brings me to the same question….REST?
Actually, I know we will spend part of the night trying to catch up (cold beer included) with all that has happened to us.
Dami and I have been friends for a long time and even though he’s much younger than me, we get along really well. I wonder what he would say when I tell him I’m single now. I know he has feelings for me…would he make a move? I hope not, because I’m not ready for a relationship with anybody right now. Now, about another kind of catching up….Oh My!! I’ve been soooooooo lonely these two years LOL, just kidding.
Tomorrow we have “The Calls” which is an important Carnival Parade where you can see groups from all over the country.

I think I’m gonna have a nice time there, I need it so badly.

FrOm SaDnEsS To AnGeR

2007-02-15T14:13:00.001-02:00

During all the time I shared my life with him, we used to say certain words or phrases that now I can’t utter any more, like cielo, bebe, me vua mimil, te adoro, and many diminutives and silly things that people use when they are in love, not mentioning the ones we invented. Well, I’ve noticed how difficult has become to say or listen to those words now. I feel that part of my everyday vocabulary suddenly turned against me and it hurts a lot. It’s not necessary to tell you how awful I feel when I think he’s saying all those words to some one else. Gosh, it’s like if everything links me to one of our memories. I’m getting too tired of this feeling…..
Yesterday he sent me a Saint Valentine txt message wishing me a beautiful day, WHAT??? Does he know how much I’m suffering? The thing is that in Puerto Rico people celebrate the day of love and friendship, and I guess he sent the message for the friendship part, anyway WHAT?????? I could have sent HIM a thousand messages because I still love him, but not him, he deserted me and I have nothing to celebrate!! I would have preferred to get a txt about whatever he wanted to tell me, but not something related to that day. He sent his message form his phone and the he sent me another one from the Movistar webpage to confirm I had gotten the previous one….WHAT?? I answered him very nicely and politely, but inside my heart I was crying in silence.
I’ve been feeling better though, at least I don’t have that feeling of emptiness in my chest and I’ve have smiled some times these days….still I’m not the Analia you know but I’ll get there, just give me time.
Last night, I was trying to find a sad song that reflected this moment of my life and I came across one that hit the nail on the head. I showed it to my friend Cale and he says I’m being a little cruel. Actually, I know that if I translate it, Ruth, Auds and Stewie might tell me off and say I shouldn’t think that way. What can I say? I listened to this song and a heavy burden left my body, it was such a relief. Of course I don’t want to see him suffering, and I would NEVER wish him anything bad, however today and ONLY for today despite of all my love, this is the perfect song for him.
A good friend of mine says that after the clouds of sadness go away, the clouds of anger come…only then the sky opens and we can finally stretch out under the sun and heal our wounds. He may be right.
By the way, I’m going to Durazno again this weekend to visit my friend Damian; I have some ideas in mind about catching up with certain things…let’s see if I dare LOL ( I wonder if you can read my mind this time)
I see you later family, love you all.

Now, the video and the lyrics….do some Babel fish translation this time : )

Ojalá que te mueras que se abra la tierra
y te hundas en ella que todos te olviden.

Ojalá que te cierren las puertas del cielo y
que todos te humillen que se llene tu
alma de penas y entre más te duelan
que más te lastimen.

Ojalá que te mueras que tu alma se vaya
al infierno y que se haga eterno tu
llanto, ojalá pagues caro el haberme
engañado aun queriéndote tanto que se
claven espinas en tu corazón si es que
aun tienes algo.

Ojalá sea un tormento acordarte de mi
si es que un día lo haces, ojalá sea tanto
el dolor que supliques perdón y se vuelva
tan insoportable.

Ojalá que te mueras que todo tu mundo
se vaya al olvido se que no debo odiarte
pero es imposible tratar de olvidar lo
que hiciste conmigo.

Ojalá que te mueras que todo tu mundo
se quede vacío, ojala cada gota de
llanto te queme hasta el alma ojalá que
no encuentres la calma ojalá que te
mueras.

Ojalá sea un tormento acordarte de mi…

Ojalá que te mueras que todo tu mundo…

Ojalá que te mueras que todo tu mundo…

I'm sTiLL StAnDiNg

2007-02-13T15:44:00.000-02:00

Some time ago I learned a word from Ruth that has become very important in my life: Serendipity. In these days that I’m going through, no other word is better than this one to explain what has happened to me.
The day I found out about the end of my love story I wanted to die, that’s the naked truth. I could have done anything to ease my pain, however it was not meant to happen. A private student was with me at that moment, more a friend than a student actually, and he stayed by my side, watching after me for hours. Another friend was on her way home, and suddenly she felt the urgency of coming to my house, she didn’t know why, but now I’m glad she came.
I met long time ago a boy named Jose Alberto, whose nick is Baby Jordan; he became my cyber nephew and I love him with all my heart. He was without internet connection for some months, so we lost contact for a while, guess what! He appeared out of nothing that day late at night in my MSN saying TITI I LOVE YOU, (titi means aunty) He made me smile despite of all my tears.
In 2000 I had a Swedish boy, an exchange student, living in my house for a whole year and soon he became like a son for us. For different reasons we lost contact some years ago, so I’ve been looking for him since then. Last week I came across a phone number in the white pages of Sweden and I sent a TXT message just in case. It was him!!!! He answered yesterday and I smiled again for the second time. SERENDIPITY!!!!
It goes without saying that my blog family has been right there for me in this moment of sorrow, and though it might not be serendipity this time with them, it was serendipity the day they felt something wrong was going on and they started asking and sending emails to check if everything was all right.
Maybe God put his hand on me, because I feel I’ve been blessed in so many ways.
Yes, I’m still sad, but I’m not blind. I can see that there’s magic in life and that I’m loved. That’s reason enough to start picking up the pieces of my heart and keep on walking, isn’t it?
Love you all.

I translated the song in 2 minutes, so there might be mistakes, however it’s a beautiful one and I wanted to share it with you today…..it’s my heart speaking.

Nobody speaks to me about you, yet I miss you
I can’t resign myself to forgetting you, even though the years go by
What is of you? Where are you?
How far are you from my loneliness?

How much I wish to know if you still remember me,
If you’ve asked for me, if my absence hurts you
What has changed in you, and in your heart?
How has your life go on after my love?

Since you are not here, I can’t any longer find again the meaning of freedom
I can’t image to start again without you
I want to know what happened to you.
Since you are not here…….happened to you.

Since you are not here, only pain lives in me.
My life goes away without knowing about you.

Since you are not here, I can’t any longer find again the meaning of freedom
I can’t image to start again without you
I want to know what happened to you.
Since you are not here…….happened to you.

Since you are not here, only pain lives in me.
My life goes away without knowing about you……my love.

FoRsAkEn

2007-02-09T04:15:00.000-02:00

My deepest fear has become true and now I wonder what it will be of me without him in my life….I feel I won’t be able to go on….I’m sure I won’t be.
I could sense he was drifting apart…that’s something a woman in love never gets wrong…he never dared to admit the end was coming…not until today…the worst day I have never gone through.
The only man I have truly loved decided to move on, leaving me immerse in complete darkness, frightened, and distraught.
And now, where will I find strength to go on if he was my pillar and my foundation…..I’m falling down and what you see it’s what is left from me, just the rubbles of a woman who gave everything she had for this man.
I won’t beg, he won’t hear me saying please come back, but inside my heart there’s a voice shouting “please don’t go away”.
Yes, I know you will tell me that time heals all wounds, that I have to be strong, that there’s hope if there is life…you may be right, but I’m too sad, too tired…I can’t believe there’s a tomorrow for me.
No, I won’t die yet I’m already dead. Those who have loved as I do will understand what I feel.
His love for me has died and I’m grieving.
Some of you have read my story with him…..well, my prince finally gave me the coup of grace….the last stabbing.
I’m mourning my dead dreams my friends, I need time to reassure myself if that is possible…..I can’t see any light right now.
I’m sorry to disappoint all of you….I don’t feel like dancing or smiling, though I know that’s what you always expect from me. I’m falling in a bottomless pit and there’s no way out.
I love him so much, I only want to cry and cry ‘till I drop asleep…..I just can’t go on.

I wonder if he is happy now….I wonder if I deserved this pain….I wonder if she will love him as I do or if he will love her as he loved me once…long time ago.
I’m gone. Don't worry for me. I love you all

GoNe WiTh ThE WiNd

2007-02-07T16:02:00.000-02:00

No, it’s not an illusion…it’s me!! I’m back! :)
I’ve been through so many things that now I need some time to organize my ideas to tell you comprehensibly about these days away.
First thing, the real cause of my “nonappearance”, I was pickpocketed some days ago, and this situation brought many collateral damages. The last money I had was GONE, therefore, I couldn’t pay the electricity bill and the light was GONE. My documentation was GONE so I had to get everything done again, my good mood was GONE, so I didn’t want to sit in front of my pc and finally, I was GONE for the weekend because if I had stayed in my house my common sense would be GONE by now as well.
Let’s talk about the weekend I spent in Durazno, a city in the middle of my country, which sounds better than all the other gone things.
I went to visit someone, a friend I haven’t seen in months. We had a really good time, we chatted a lot and we went to a folk festival that takes place every year in February.
It was a great idea to go there since yesterday I started working again and that was my last summer activity…..well, I still have the weekends, but it’s not the same.

I’ll be visiting you tonight or early tomorrow. Wait for me ok?
Love you all

UrUgUaYaN NeSsIe

2007-01-27T02:26:00.000-02:00

My kids returned home today after almost a week with their father. Ten minutes later, all the kids on the block found out they were here and started coming one by one. Can Seba come out to play with us? Is Manu here? Can we come in?
Suddenly no less than 8 kids were coming in and going out of literally each room of the house!
I tried to use my Pc and some of them were there…I went to the kitchen, it was already taken…I prepared my things to take a shower, my older son was there….I went to my bedroom and AHHHHH my little son was watching TV.
I was a placeless woman so I took the boat and headed to the lake….as I was crossing the gate I heard: Can we go with you? OH MY GOD!!
I said, “Sure, but….” And I put an intriguing face. “What, what!!!”
“Well, I’ve heard some stories...are you sure you want to come? Someone told me about a strange THING in the middle of the water….actually I’ve noticed the boat rocks too much sometimes….but yes, come with me, maybe we can see IT if the water is clear today”
Of course they desisted immediately and I left alone with a broad smile on my face.
PEACE!!
You won’t believe this, but as I was listening to music and rowing peacefully, something hit the boat from below. It could have been a dock trying to come out of the water; it could have been a fish called Wanda or a branch that fell off a tree on the shore. It could have been anything but I rowed SOOOOOOOO fast to go away that I pictured myself as the cartoon characters when they cannot run and move the legs in the same place.
I sat down on the sand and I burst out laughing….. I’m still laughing at myself as I write this post…..Am I not the foolest on earth?? Don’t answer!!!!!

I want to share some pics from the lake and my boat……no Nessie at sight LOL

Love you all xxxxxxxxx

PrOvEd

2007-01-26T18:33:00.000-02:00

Some days ago I was doing my blog surfing and I came across a very disgusting surprise…the worst thing was to finally prove I wasn’t so wrong after all.
I’ve visited many blogs where parents upload pictures of their kids; I don’t see that as a problem, actually I have left messages to the proud parents in some occasions telling them how cute their baby is. In fact, I have posted pictures of my children, too.
However, when I see a picture of a kid naked or half naked I can’t help thinking that someone may be looking at those pictures with sick eyes.
I remember once I uploaded a photo of Manuel, he was in bed smiling and the sun coming through the window was playing with his blond hair, it was beautiful picture of my little angel. But then an upsetting thought made me shiver…. what if … and I took the picture away.
To be honest, I ended up considering I was wrong, that I shouldn’t think that way, that maybe I was the sick person who saw danger everywhere…but still, there was something in the whole situation that kept hammering my mind.
You may be asking what I am talking about…well, let me explain it.
I came across a pedophile blogger, yes, a man who not only openly admitted his condition, but also has pictures he had collected through the net. Pictures of innocent kids posted by innocent parents who were proud of showing the world their most beloved treasures.
This man, if the word man applies to him, claims he is not committing any crime and dares to condemn people for not understanding him and for making him live under a relentless persecution.
I was so irritated that I preferred to stop reading all that shit (pardon my French).
Sadly, it won’t disappear just because I closed the page.
I did some Google search and I found out there are many blogs with the same topic, which gives me the idea that criminals who use blogs for their illegal apology of crime have found the perfect place for their misdeeds. It seems that the blog world is a no one’s land; hence, it has no legal system at all.
As a mother, I have the need of giving other parents a little and humble piece of advice: Please, watch out what pictures you post! There are indeed evil people out there who will profit with your innocence. Also watch out what your older kids post, sometimes they risk too many things in a single post.

That was my disgusting discovery, and believe me, I wish I had been wrong….I still wish it were a bad dream.

I’ll post something positive next time….promise.
Love and xxxxxxxxxxx

TaGgEd AgAiN :)

2007-01-24T14:13:00.000-02:00

Six weird things about me…..only six?

1) I cover my feet with a blanket (even in the hottest summer) when I go to sleep just in case there’s someone under the bed.
2) I can’t help reading first the last page of magazines and books! No problem with the magazines…but I spoil all my books surprising ends.
3) When I see a spider I don’t kill it immediately, I curse a lot first and then I smash it up (is there and ecologist in the room? I hope not)
4) I interview myself at night and I always give the best answers.
5) My number 5 is exactly as Ruth's Go there and read it ….LOL, aren’t we crazy?
6)I check the doors and the gas no less than five times before going to sleep or going out….compulsive?

Thanks God I was asked to share only six…I was already getting afraid of myself!!
I should tag other people….can I tag everybody again?

TaGgEd

2007-01-24T02:48:00.000-02:00

I was tagged by Ruth to answer the following questions and I tag everybody to do the same!!

If you could build a house anywhere, where would it be?
Puerto Rico
What’s your favorite article of clothing?
Mini skirts
Favorite physical feature of the opposite sex?
Hands
What’s the last CD that you bought?
Oh! I can’t remember that….too much P2P nowadays :)
Where’s your favorite place to be?
The lake in front of my house
Where is your least favorite place to be?
The kitchen when I have to cook
What’s your favorite place to be massaged?
Shoulders (I wonder what’s Ruth’s for she can’t type it naughty girl)
Strong in mind or strong in body?
Mind…my body is too jelly Ahhh!!!
What time do you wake up in the morning?
Does it matter? It’s always too damn early!
What is your favorite kitchen appliance?
First….What’s the meaning of kitchen?
What makes you really angry?
My mini-me
If you could play any instrument, what would it be?
Spanish Guitar
Favorite colour?
Red
Which do you prefer…sports car or SUV?
I prefer a CAR, I don’t have one :S
Do you believe in an afterlife?
Yes…..and a beforelife too
Favorite children’s book?
Platero and I (Juan Ramon Jimenez)
What is your favorite season?
Summer
Your least favorite household chore?
Cleaning the toilette
If you could have one super power, what would it be?
Grant wishes
If you have a tattoo, what is it?
Poison Ivy with a climbing fairy (coming soon)
Can you juggle?
OF COURSE…………not
Unless you mean with money….then YES
The one person from your past that you wish you could go back and talk to?
My grandfather
What’s your favorite day?
Friday
What’s in the trunk of your car?
I don’t have a car, but… Can I tell you what’s in the basket of my bike?
Which do you prefer, sushi or hamburger?
Hamburger…McDonald’s Combo3, thank you.

Sorry my friends, I couldn’t visit you as I promised, but my tooth neuralgia is killing me!
See you tomorrow.
Love

BoRiCuAs

2007-01-23T06:28:00.000-02:00

I wasn’t the kind of girl who would cover an entire wall with pictures of her favorite singer. Odd as it may be, I have now thousand of pictures of two singers I find exceptionally SEXY. We have a saying here “at the old age, smallpox” and it’s used when someone does or likes something that’s more common among young people. However you know me…I’m the childish-childlike Ani.
Don’t ask me why but Puerto Rico has become incredibly significant in my life, I have many cyber friends there, the love of my life lives in the island and these two singers were born there, too.
If you look at them, you will notice that I have an eclectic taste for men LOL, the fact is both of them got into me for different reasons...one because sings beautiful love songs, and dances soooooooo good, the other because sings “Reggaeton” hot songs I love to dance, I would say they are in some cases dirty songs, but I like the rhythm…(and the dirty, keep the secret please!!!!)
Don Omar and Chayanne.
Well girls, I have to warn you they are all M_I_N_E, no sharing is possible here, sorry!!!

Now, I leave some videos in the box below…you can kiss the screen if you want but I wouldn’t recommend it, they are TOO SEXY and tempting I know, but you can get an ugly electro shock…LOL

ENTRE TU Y YO

aunque te fuiste

pobre diabla

gata ganster

dile

luna

torero

guajira

lo dejaria todo

y tu te vas

I'll try to sleep now..yes, second day with insomnia...and toothache!!!

I'll visit you in the afternoon. Love you all

PoLLiTo

2007-01-22T03:17:00.000-02:00

What a day!!! I didn't have time to write anything decent today. My two sons were too busy using the pc and I was literally expelled from my desk each time I tried to sit down. I have 2 PCs but they love mine “#%¬#&” Now it’s 3 am and I should be sleeping….actually I’m not sure if I’m fully awake!! Anyway, I leave you with this picture that made me laugh…yes …..yes I’m in an evil mood... LMAO

See you tomorrow...should I say later?

Love you all

cHiLdIsH

2007-01-20T13:33:00.000-02:00

Early today I was thinking about the thank you notes I got from my co-workers in Thanksgiving. Most of them thanked me for my childishness, my childish behavior, my childish way of facing life, my childish way of making easier their days at he teacher’s lounge.
“Never lose your fresh smile and your childish sense of humor” it was written in one of them.
Well, I must confess I was surprised that being childish is not always a bad thing when you grow up, but I was even more surprised my friends see me that way.
I’ve been struggling all my life with my ups and downs and I assume I still deal with my Downs as a child does, running to cuddle up under protecting wings, and with my Ups, fooling around, dancing, singing no matter where or with whom I am, exactly as a child would do.
Yesterday, I went to do some errands with Sebastian, my older son who is experiencing all the “teenager’s symptoms”. It was quite cold for a summer night so the streets were completely empty. Even though I’ve been feeling down these days, I had the urging need to sing and dance in the middle of the street…you know, carnival atmosphere!!! My son wasn’t so happy though…..MOM stop it!! MOM Please!! MOM stay still!! And since I’m a VERY mature mom I went on by saying “BIENVENIDOS!!! BUENAS NOCHES!!!” Look at the video and see why… (I still don’t know why he got SO angry with me LOL)

When we got home I promised him I would never do that again. Some minutes later he decided to visit a friend who lives two blocks away and as soon as he was near the fence I ran to the door and shouted “Seba!!! BUENAS NOCHES!!” he started running away… but he was laughing….after all he loves his childish mom :)

I’ll be visiting my blogger friends at night, kisses and hugs for all.

My BeD.....Mi CaMa

2007-01-14T18:23:00.000-02:00

No hay un lugar como mi cama…..y no hay quien me conozca tan profundamente.
Guarda mis secretos y mis recuerdos, mis esperanzas y mis desilusiones.
Ve mi verdad y esconde mis mentiras y mis miedos.
Mi cama sabe de mi corazón roto y mis sueños perdidos, y sabe cuando lloro y porque lloro abrazada a la almohada, y me ve acurrucarme de dolor….pero guarda silencio….un silencio ensordecedor….una quietud que hiere.

There’s no place like my bed….and there’s no one who knows me so deeply.
It keeps my secrets and my memories, my hopes and disappointments.
It sees my truth and hides my lies and my fears.
My bed knows of my broken heart and my lost dreams, it knows when I cry and why I cry hugged to my pillow, and it sees me snuggling down in pain…but remains in complete silence…a deafening silence….a stillness that hurts.

To My BeD (Roque Narvaja)

I make and undo my bed
I shake off pieces of my dreams in flames
Betraying shadows of love hide their face.
A white sheet falls like the snow falls on the mountains
And I fall into your soft hands.

Square Babel Tower
Like Penelope knits anguished
And unknits frightened my nudity.

My beds knows everything I am and I can be
And she doesn’t desert me, she doesn’t desert me.
My bed bleeds every wound that scares me
And at night she rocks me and sings.

I open a chiffon door, I give in my body, she hugs me
And I put away my fists under the pillow until tomorrow.
Is my necessary mother, imitation of peat, watchdog
While she whispers her lullaby sharpens her paws.

My beds knows everything I am and I can be
And she doesn’t desert me, she doesn’t desert me.
My bed bleeds every wound that scares me
And at night she rocks me and sings.

I make and strip my bed
I separate the grain from the weed
And through a path of nothing I go back home.

KiNg MoMoS Is CoMiNg!!!

2007-01-13T20:32:00.001-02:00

KiNg MoMoS Is CoMiNg!!!

Among all the festivities we celebrate in Uruguay, Carnival is the one I enjoy the most. It is almost impossible to describe our Carnival but maybe you can get the picture by reading the following article.

To the beat of the drum and Momo Montevideo is a city with the heart of a neighbourhood and the spirit of the murguista.

By Juan Pablo de Dovitiis

With the heart of a neighbourhood rather than a large metropolis, Uruguay's capital city reflects the feel of its people through the colourful faces of its murguistas, the paintings of Joaquin
Torres Garcia, its melancholy spirit, partly influenced by its tango traditions, and the sounds of its drums booming through the February heat.

In contrast to its larger Atlantic coast neighbours, Rio de Janeiro and Buenos Aires, Montevideo does not dazzle with its lights, but rather invites visitors to mingle with a people that still gather together to drink the national drink, mate (pronounced ma-tae), in its squares and beaches
during the day, or to drum away songs to Momo, the god of carnival, at night.

Momo’s kingdom

The two best known aspects of the city’s carnival are the candombe groups and the murgas, who generally represent specific neighbourhoods of Montevideo and carry with them their own fans.

Candombe is a cultural remnant of the traditions brought by African slaves, and has its most renowned celebration during the “Llamadas” parade, a must-see for all visitors who want to see the city explode in colour and rhythm with hundreds of drummers booming through the night accompanied by traditional dancers.

The other side of Montevideo’s carnival is the murga, which is a kind of partly-sung play which has become an emblematic part of Uruguayan culture. Banned during the dictatorship of the
70s and 80s for its irreverent criticisms of the government, the different murgas of Montevideo, like Araca La Cana, Falta y Resto and La Antimurga BCG, have names that are as colourful
as the painted faces of its members, the murguistas.

I love the atmosphere when the festivity is getting closer, for those like me who love Carnival, January is the countdown time to find out about the groups, see some rehersals or to watch on TV all the preparation for the competition, which lasts sometimes more than a month.
Who competes? Well, there are diffentent categories,

Murgas, Negros y Lubolos (Candombe), Parodistas y Humoristas

MuRgAs

NeGrOs Y LuBoLoS
If you could only be there when the group of drums passes close to you!!! You can feel the drums inside your body….so unique!

PaRoDiStAs

This category is formed mostly by young boys who dance VERY GOOD and have all the girls’ eyes on them.

I have my favorites in each category, but in general I like most of the groups.
Below you can see some photograhies from previous years; how colorful February gets in our country!…I wish you could come to see the magic of KiNg MoMos….and I also wish I were black and younger to dance as those vedettes do!!!

Please visit these webpages to see hundreds of pictures of our Carnival!!

Carnival Parade

The Calls

The Competition in the Summer Theatre

.:.:.:.:.:BeLLe:.:.:.:.:.

2007-01-13T13:01:00.000-02:00

Today I woke up singing “Belle” from the Beauty and the Beast”, I don’t know why…maybe I had a dream, who knows…. Or maybe it’s because many times I feel like her…not for the belle part of course, but for the weird :(
I’m going to the beach now and since I won’t be posting anything till late tonight. I leave you with this Latin version of the song. You can enjoy and learn some Spanish, too!!!

TWo PoStS At ThE pRiCe Of OnE

2007-01-13T03:09:00.000-02:00

Oh yes, THAT you’ve learned, haven’t you?

Ever since Manuel was a baby I have spoken English to him (not all the time of course) to see if he can learn it without going to a Language school. Some time after he started to speak our own language, he said, bubbling but clear enough, “MUM I LOVE YOU” , and for me that was a double delight, for his words and for the language!
I continued speaking English to him, but he wouldn’t say anything else. After a while he would refuse even to hear a word in English, moreover, he used to say I was speaking DIRTY!! English = Dirty, uh?
–“Mom, speak well, please!!!! I HATE ENGLISH” he would say, so I had to put a sort of an end to the “saveurmoneyinthefuture” experiment.
Now he is four and he has made many friends in the neighborhood. Yesterday, they were playing some PC game in his room and according to what they were talking, he lost the fight and…… What English word is that I heard coming out from the beautiful mouth of my LITTLE BABY?????
–“F*CK! Me mató! (He killed me) F*CK YOU! Tengo que empezar todo de nuevo (I have to start all over)
He was speaking Spanglish and dirty! Double grief!!!!! Again for his word and for the language!

MANUEL VENTURA!!! I shouted from the kitchen: What are you saying? Stop doing that RIGHT NOW! (I always include his last name to sound more emphatic LOL)
He had an answer of course…..”BUT MOM! I LOVE ENGLISH!!!!!...Teach me more!”

GaRliC, oNiOnS aNd PaRsLeY

I know it’s not good to be alone when you want to be with someone. I have talked about this before and I might do it again someday in the future, but tonight I feel like speaking about a good aspect of it.
In the afternoon my kids went to visit their father, so I’ll be alone until Sunday.
I spent the first 2 hours alone rowing in the lake and watching a beautiful sunset. Then I came home and I took a loooooooooong shower. Nobody was in a hurry; consequently I used the entire hot-water heater… until the very last drop!!
It was getting late; I didn’t have any plans for the night and no companion at sight, so I decided to prepare something to eat.
I was about to eat just a rib steak when I saw some garlic over the counter….I chopped it….I saw some onions…..I chopped one…..I saw parsley….I chopped it. …everything to the frying pan and DONE!! It was so delicious!
Here is where the good part comes….I DON’T HAVE TO KISS ANYBODY!!!! I don’t care if some parsley got stuck between my teeth or if my breath can kill a plant.
I enjoyed every bite of my dinner, I haven’t combed my hair yet and I’m still wrapped with my towel YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I FEEL GOODDDDDDDD YEAHHHHHHHH na na na na na na

I must have a problem with my ears ´cause I can’t get a single word from this song, but it made me laugh anyway and that’s my quite silly and happy mood today CHACARRON MACARRON

EaSiEr sAiD ThAn dOnE

2007-01-12T11:05:00.000-02:00

Yesterday I had a busy but nice day. Some friends came over and we went to a beach resort an hour away. I got home quite late and I sat in front of the keyboard....nothing came to my mind...I spent half an hour thinking about what to post and NOTHING!! So I decided to call it a day and go to sleep. I was about to fall asleep when a crazy, or not so crazy, idea came to my miend...YESSSSS this is what I want to post!!! I spent another hour preparing the post...easier said than done....(you'll see what I mean) I can't believe how hard some small things can get.
This is for you my friends, in particular for my bloggeteers :)

Love you all...Ani

ScArEd Me? BaH….

2007-01-10T12:22:00.000-02:00

I’m not the kind of people who gets scared easily. I’m not afraid of neither walking in the dark nor of facing a thief, which I know is something stupid to do but…..can’t help it. I have made a sudden stop in the middle of the street to yell not very nice words to someone who’s been following me, and I love reading horror books, the movies now make me laugh more than scream. I’m very fond of everything that deals with the unknown and I want to turn them known, the Ouija a must in my younger years!!!….you see, I’m a brave person…..unless I’m in “The ScArEfOfNoNsEnSeS Day”. Yes, once in a while I have one of those days and believe me, I can get scared of things that make others laugh…at me, of course.
I was reading some of my previous posts earlier today and I found one I had written in Spanish, I’ll try to translate it now so you get to know how mi mind works (or stops working) when one of those days hunts me.

(It was hot, too suffocating and I couldn’t sleep. I decided to open all the windows)
Finally some fresh air! But if some bug gets inside while I’m sleeping? Spiders? No, I better close them again. God, It’s hot in here! Ok, I’ll open the window just a little bit.
Humm, my bed is just a few inches away the window….and if someone appears and snoops, or takes my wireless phone from the night table? What a dilemma….I better shut it. I won’t sleep this way, impossible!! I’ll open them and I’ll keep looking through just in case….at least I’ll catch some air. Oh my! What If while I’m looking outside someone gets inside through the door behind me? I know! I’ll lie on my back and with my 20/20 vision I’ll have all the entrances controlled. (Of course that at 3 in the morning, my tired eyes start seeing shadows passing by) Could it be a ghost? No, why there should be ghost here! I’m tired, that what it is…. Just in case I will take a look. (I don’t turn the lights on, so I can barely distinguish my furniture and I forget about the mirror on the corridor) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh sh*t, I saw something!! I run away and I realize it was me, damn it!
(The wind starts to blow harder and the doors make a jarring noise) Definitely, there are ghosts; I better leave the door ajar….but if someone looks at me through the gap? I don’t know what to do, I better shut it…but if I do I won’t know if there’s someone behind…I better leave it wide open.
(A strident noise comes from outside, like a plane passing by, but is too late for planes here, I forget about ghosts for a moment) What’s that? Is that a plane? Is it falling? Could it be the gas station in flames? I’m sure everything will explode…I will look through the window, no, no, I prefer not to know…I go to bed and wait.
Mmmm I’m hungry, I’m gonna fix a sandwich; I hope there’s no one hidden in the kitchen. I’m going to turn back all of a sudden and catch him unaware….AHA!!!! (Nobody there, I run to my bedroom as being taken by the Devil)
Back in my room…What’s that noise under my bed? I won’t look, no definitely I won’t, but just in case I’ll cover my feet. I start sweating.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH the THING UNDER MY BED JUMPED OVER ME!!
I hit it so hard that it flew to the other side of the room, I turned the lights on……POOR MY DOG!!It was dawn, I fell asleep.

I omitted the tsunami part, which would be too much LOL

An UnExPeCtEd StOpOvEr

2007-01-10T02:25:00.000-02:00

“The world it’s just a place where our soul rests before begining a new flight”

“At night, in our dreams, our soul takes a breath, escapes from its jail and travels far away and its free like a bird and beautiful like the stars reflected in the mirror of the sea”

A wandering muse might have entered through the wrong window for I have grabbed my pen and written some lines I haven’t thought of.
There must be a poet somewhere, waiting for her while scrawling words on a white piece of paper, however she is here playing with my mind and smiling at me.

Whose muse is this, whose lines am I stealing?

I don’t know why she decided to come in nor when she is planing to leave…Is she running away? Is she planing to stay?
I’m not a writer and I’m far from being a poet, yet she dances between my lines as I write words that I no longer know if they are mine.

Should I tell her to go away?
I’ll leave my windows open tonight in case she wants to find her way home…..who knows? She might remember her poet and fly to his arms.

Love you all, Analia

aLmOsT CuRsEd.....aLmOsT?

2007-01-08T15:12:00.000-02:00

I was doing some errands in the morning with Manuel when suddenly, out of nowhere, a gypsy woman approached me. She wanted to show me some sheets and pots she was selling. I said, “Thank you, but I don’t need anything right now” and I continued walking. She grabbed my hand as I was leaving and insisted on reading it. I said, “Sorry, but I don’t want my future read, I prefer not to know” and I smiled gently…. but she wouldn’t let me go. “Give me some money and I tell you everything you need to know” she persisted. I started getting angry but I replied politely “No lady, I’m in a hurry and I have to go”
The gypsy released my hand and I started going away when I heard the woman saying “I’m gonna curse you”….WHYYYYYYYY??? Just because I said no?
I turned and I looked at her angrily…YOU ARE DOING WHAT? HOW DARE YOU!
Not far away was the gypsy queen together with some other women and she came closer as she heard our shouting.
They started talking in their language and making all kind of gestures…..I thought to myself “I’M SCREWED!!” but anyway I said “Hold your horses!! This is not fair, speak Spanish right now!” They stopped talking and the oldest woman asked me to explain my side of the story…..I was doing it when someone else came to us. Hey! She said “how are you doing? Remember me?”
I met this young girl on a bus some months ago while I was still living in Montevideo and we started talking all the way to my job, for an hour or so. That day she told me people never talk to them, some because of fear, others because of the way they dress and live, and the rest just because of the unknown. She was about getting married those days and I found very interesting everything about the ceremony. It was an enriching conversation for me……and now I know it was also good for her.
The oldest gypsy ordered the first woman to lift any kind of curse she could have cast on me, but she said she had cast no spell and smiled. I didn’t smile back to her but I did thank and say goodbye to the other gypsies.
Manuel? Well he was complaining about his sore hand…why?... all the time I was holding him so tight!!! POOR THING :(

When the sun goes a little down I will go to the lake with the boat….if I don’t come back you will know the reason. THE GYPSY CURSE!! LOL
Oh My! I was truly scared…I think I still am.
Love and Kisses to all

LeT's sMiLe FoR A wHiLe

2007-01-07T23:53:00.000-02:00

Today I had a little complicated day, :( therefore I didn't have time to write anything for my blog. I'm about to format my pc and since there are many softwares I want to have again in my pc I started checking many cds where I have backuped important things. The weird thing is that in all the cds I opened I found these first two videos...and when I say all I mean ALL!!
I want to share them with you because they are funny and because I like them a lot!!!

Video: Pixar - For the birds

This video wasn't in all my cds, but I watched it today, too and I thought about someone who may like to dance and sing in the kitchen with me... and perhaps certain new blond with greenfingers would like to join us :) LOL LET'S DANCE!!!!!!

Kings and Queen

2007-01-06T21:33:00.000-02:00

Gee! I was rowing all day long and I can barely type a word!! But I have no words to express how happy I am. And yet I’m a bit sad because I spoiled all the pictures again…something must be wrong with my camera :’(
I wish you could have seen my son’s face when he opened his gifts…his eyes jumping out from the sockets like a cartoon character, springs included!
And my older son!! He thought he wouldn’t get anything because he’s a teen now, too old to get presents from the Kings, but too young to give up hoping secretly to get at least a little something. He did! I went to buy the presents for Manuel with him, so he thought that was it…but I (clever mother) went alone to buy the one for him and hid it, so both of my sons were surprised and joyful! And me? Well, you know how I felt by looking at their eyes…heaven.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Let’s move to another subject…..my garden or that empty place in front of my house LOL. It’s summer and it should be a party of colours, what can I do?????
HUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!! RUTH I NEED YOU!!!
Just take a look
Ruth’s garden

Ani’s garden :(

Guess who has green fingers?

HUGS AND KISSES

The ThReE WiSe KiNgS

2007-01-06T10:11:00.000-02:00

Today we celebrate “The ThreeWise Kings Day”. I’ve loved this day all my life.
When I was a child I used to write long letters with the list of presents I would like to have, somehow they managed to bring me good things, not all the items on the list of course, but I was always happy. I realize now my parents sort of guided me when writing the letter “to help me with the ideas” like I do now with my little son and I did with Sebastian when he was younger…..imagine!! “Dear Wise Kings…I’ve been a good child, Could you please bring me a car, a pony, a Gas Station, skates, etc, etc etc….!!!” Impossible with low salaries like my parents had and not viable now for me being a teacher, so some guide is needed, isn’t it?

__Oh dear, wouldn’t you like to have a Bike instead of a pony? You see, ponies eat too much and we don’t have enough room…will it sleep in your bedroom?
__ Yes mom, you’re right, I’ll ask for a bike (I had the bike already bought and wrapped of course).

I used to live in a small town and all my relatives lived no more than 10 blocks away, so after opening the gifts at home I would visit all the other houses where I had left a shoe to let the Kings know there was a child in the family…my grandparents, my aunts, Godparents, you know. On my way to those houses I could see all the kids on the street, with many toys and wide smiles going from place to place. What a fantastic day!

Now that I’m a “kind of childish grown-up” I still love this day because I’ve become the “Wise Kings!” and I love to keep the magic for my sons. Yesterday night, we went out with Manuel to pick up some grass for the camels and then we put a bucket of water next to the Xmas tree, you see, camels are very tired from the long trip and they need to eat and drink something in every house to keep on travelling.
I waited for hours until my son finally fell asleep to throw the water and the grass and then put the presents over the shoes. I was so exited!! I left some grass scattered on the floor from the tree to the door, because camels are not very neat when they eat, are they?

It was hard to sleep on Wise Kings Eve when I was a child, and I would wake up very early in the morning and run to the tree to see what they had brought to me…now, WHY IS MY SON STILL SLEEPING!!!! It’s 10 o’clock already and I’m holding my camera to snap the moment he sees the presents…but he is SLEEPING! I have faked a hard coughing, I have dropped some knives, opened the windows to wake him up….and I’m about to start singing out loud….YES I know what you are thinking and YES I’m a child, but you know me, I can’t help it….
Well, I have to go; there is some extra noise I have to make LOL.
I’ll come back later with some pictures. Love you all

By the way, have I told you one of the presents is a boat and I really want to go to the lake right now?? MANUUUUUUUUU WAKE UPPPPPPPPPPPPP

"Uno nunca se está yendo. Siempre está volviendo"

2007-01-05T14:43:00.000-02:00

Amigo...esta cancion es para ti...ya sabes mi razon para regalartela, asi como yo se la tuya para recibirla.

NoT WoRkInG StRaTeGy

2007-01-04T00:17:00.000-02:00

I haven’t exercised much lately…well ok ok, I haven’t worked out at all!! I’m in the “whocaresifeverythinginmybodygoesdown” mood.
As I told you some days before, here we eat too much during the Holidays; you can’t imagine how big my tummy has grown in a week!!!
Everybody here is on a diet now, but not me my friends!! I have a good strategy...I stay still so nothing in me moves, hold my breath to hide my belly when someone is close enough and release it when he leaves, aha!!!!!!!! Smart girl!!
So, today I went to the beach, I sat motionless in my chair and opened my book. So far so good.
Oh No!! Problems, big problems!!! My bookmarker flew away and I had to go after it because it was a gift from someone I love…There I was running in front of many people and thinking OH MY I look like jelly!!
I sat down again looking around and doing some math to estimate how many ppl have seen that horrifying show….the jelly woman :(
I continue reading and suddenly I heard a voice calling me from far away. It was someone I know together with 5 or 6 friends, Oh noooooo!!! I took a deep breath and I was ready to say hi. They stayed FOREVER and EVER, and I might be an expert on not breathing for a while but I’m not Houdini!!
And there they were talking and talking, and there I was SUFFOCATING!
When they finally left I was incredibly exhausted…..but I succeeded!
It was getting late and I prepared my things to go back home, and guess what??? A former student of mine appears from nowhere and says "TEACHERRRRRRRRRR HI!!" Too late, I didn’t have time to stay still or hold my breath!!! I guess there is one student who WON’T have the fantasy of seducing the teacher next semester LOL….maybe I should bribe him to be sure no one else knows…hummm or kill him…just kidding LOL, the bribe will do for now.
Now...there’s something I have to do…what was that? Oh yes, yes, find a good gym and buy some lettuce!!!

BaLaDa DeL ReFlEjO

2007-01-03T14:36:00.000-02:00

Who knows why certain songs touch your soul so deeply, this one is my favourite one and I still don’t know the reason…there must be something I still have to find out.
This is the second time I post the song, there may be others….
I translated it but I think I spoiled part of the magic this singer has in his words.
His name is Fernando Delgadillo, a Mexican singer, and I love all his songs (and I find him cute too…another mystery to solve)

I dwell inside the mirror where will halt the time
all the ones who compose themselves and pose for it

Immersed in my work I clean the other side
And this, my best cloth, what shines it can make!
From a pale old gold to a whip of sun,
from an average dull to the subsequent cloudy,
to play on my own way like a bee
in the garden of the moon of my never-ending mirror

I keep in an enchanted room my main window
to a world that nobody comes to touch.
Country of illusions, the dreams and the perhaps
kingdoms that no longer we are eager to name.

I know about the substances with which dreams that will always be are made and I know the words that will make you awake.
I know to go back over my steps after what is gone
or to fly there where I will never see

Moon of my sad nights,
moon of my vanity,
moon of my life of intimate clarity.
Gadget of the perhaps, mirror of my heart
you taught me to see from your prison

I dwell inside the mirror where will halt the time
all the ones who compose themselves and pose for it

I know about my job of playing with the time
And this, my best cloth, what shines it can make!

ThE BiG ReD DoT ….”sMiLeS FaCtOrY”

2007-01-03T01:02:00.000-02:00

Look at the map at the side of my page…can you see the big red dot? There`s where the smiles factory is located…and as you can see, there are many branches all around the world.
This factory works with magic, a kind of magic hard to find in other places, a kind of magic that paints my blues with whites and greens and rainbows…. and perfumes my soul and fills my heart until the enchantment does its work and I finally smile no matter how sad I had been before.
Behind that big red dot there are caring people with feather hands, where I cuddle imaginarily and where I find shelter from my worries. They know exactly what to say to touch my heart and to ease my mind…. and I run unconsciously to their arms, like a child with scraped knees runs towards his loving mother.
This factory has three fantastic managers, each of them with a particular light which brings brightness over the shadows that cover me sometimes.
They are always there, working together and ready to make me think, to make me respond, to make me keep walking, to make me Smile!
I hope some day to be able to make others smile…What a wonderful job!
If only I had a thousandth part of their light….

Thank you for your magic.

This old but beautiful song is for Ruth, Auds and Mile

No TiTlE ToDaY

2007-01-02T02:36:00.000-02:00

I spent alone New Year’s Eve. I thought it was gonna be easier, but it wasn’t….it wasn’t easy at all. I checked my watch once and again waiting for midnight….minutes seemed to run too slow and my loneliness seemed to grow too fast.
I went to my roof right before 12 and sat down in my favourite chair to watch the sky. It was a starry night and the moon was brighter than ever or so it seemed.
At 12 the sky was covered by beautiful fireworks, and from my particular viewpoint it was really overwhelming. I grabbed my glass, and I made a toast in the air to many many things….. And I cried for a while, it was like washing my soul to start clean this New Year….I felt my tears that way, but I would have chosen not to cry….

2007 is the year of my 40 and I have some months to get used to the idea…I suffered when I turned 30, imagine now!!! I have so many dreams to fight for, yet too many daydreams I have to give up… (one of them I won’t ever let go, that’s what keeps me alive day after day)
I made in silence my New Year’s resolutions….I know I will forget most of them in the short run, but meanwhile it feels good to have a plan.

I didn’t take my blog tour today, maybe tomorrow if I feel more optimistic….you know, I’m getting better little by little, but I still have low days, today way too low I’ll say.
My kids came back home this afternoon and the house is active again, good thing!! I won’t have time for my blues….
Tomorrow I’ll wake up and do something Auds told me a month ago …….Take a good look in the mirror and say hello to that wonderful person reflected there...........OFTEN!!!Then give her a smile- she deserves it.....
I will, that I can promise.

WhErE CaN I fInD a CoOl PlAcE!!!

2007-01-01T15:23:00.000-02:00

Ohhh nooooooooo 91 F in my city!!!!! Too hot to write, too tired to think!!! ( went dancing yesterday night or today in the morning hehe.
I’ll comeback later should the air get cooler.
I leave you with a song…..that’s my mood today :)

Chorando se foi quem um dia so me fez chorar
Chorando se foi quem um dia so me fez chorar

Chorando estara ao lembrar de um amor
Que um dia nao soube cuidar
Chorando estara ao lembrar de um amor
Que um dia nau soube cuidar

A recordacao vai estar com ele aonde for
A recordacao via estar pre sempre aonde zu for

Danca sol e mar guardarei no othar
O amor faz perder encontar
Lambando estarei ao lembrar que este amor
Por um dia um instante foi rei

A recordacao vai estar com ele aonde for
A recordacao via estar pre sempre aonde zu for

Chorando estara ao lembrar di um amor
Que um dia nao soube cuidar

Cancao riso e dor melodia de amor
Um momento qu fica no ar

I-I-I
Losenta Lambada

ThE NeStS

2006-12-30T21:28:00.000-02:00

My mother loves writing; she writes short stories and poems. I have many of them here in my desk, but I must confess I don’t like reading them. You might ask why…Its only that I have mixed feelings when I read my mom’s sad poems…I don’t know if it’s what she really feels or she is just writing about an imaginary situation…who knows…
Anyway, I translated one of them today and soon I’ll create a blog to post all her wrintings. She deserves it and I…well….I’ll pluck up courage, that’s the least I can do for my mom.

ThE NeStS

Today I took a nest from my garden lamp
I got it in my hands and it makes me sad
And I look my nest of man and your nest of bird
And I feel we look much alike.
I saw your efforts to build it, just like mine
Brick and straws, like that you and I started
Running and flying days and hours until we finished
And then we upholstered them inside with tender and feathers
Waiting for the arrival of our little ones
I got back to my running and you to your flying to support them
And one day they left and it hurts to admit it
I miss the crying, the laughing and the cheeping
How much alike we are…man and bird with empty nests.
But time goes by and one day it will be spring
And there’ll be new life in our warm nests
And in the air a new miracle, a different echo
Our children will come back…. yours, mine
And the afternoon will burst with laughing and chirping….

Idelva Mascetti....my mom

LoOk WhO’S BaCk :)

2006-12-30T13:28:00.000-02:00

I came back yesterday night from my parents’ house, I opened all the windows, prepared a cool drink and came to my pc to find out my internet wasn’t working. Oh My!!!!! My web abstinence syndrome reached its highest point and I started shaking, sweating, swearing...pleaseeeeeeeeeeee get connected stupid modem!!! (Sorry for that hehe) Well, the thing is that my parents don’t have a pc at home, and it was too hot to walk to the nearest cyber cafe, I didn’t go online even once during my days there….honestly I preferred the beach, the sun, the river and of course my family and our catching up with everything.
I went to the beach almost everyday and now I’m completely RED, not tanned but RED!! My fault I admit…and my Hawaiian Tropic which I always say I’ll never use it again, and I do over and over….soon my skin will fall as if I were a reptile, sniff, sexy uh?
I took some pictures, not many though, for you to get to know my family.
About mom…she’s doing fine…we talked a lot and she let me take her to the doctor next time, but the most important thing is that she’s getting better little by little…..a good gift from Santa, isn’t it? …a blessing from God for sure.
I’m taking a blog tour later to visit all my friends. Love you ppl.

HaPpY XmAs My DeAr FrIeNdS

2006-12-22T13:34:00.000-02:00

Well my friends, I’m heading to my town tomorrow morning. I feel restless and I don’t know why….or I do. I’ll see all my family and friends, some of them I haven’t seen in years, so it will be a nice get together I think. I’ll finally see my mom and dad and I hope to have that conversation that we owe each other.
I’m taking all of you in my heart and you will be there by my side I know when I rise my glass to toast for a better and wonderful life.
I won’t be posting from there since there’s no pc at home, but I promise to come soon with all the stories from this trip and some pics if possible.
May you all have the best Xmas with your beloved ones and fill your life with joy and hope…this is what Xmas is all about, love and hope.

MILE, RUTH, AUDS, CALE, STEPHEN GOD BLESS YOU!! AND ALL MY FRIENDS FROM THE CYBERSPACE AND THE ONES I HAVE MET THROUGH LIFE
((((((((((((((((((( THE BIGGEST HUG )))))))))))))))))))

I leave you with EL TAMBORILERO, by Don Omar, a singer from Puerto Rico, the place I dream I could end my life….that’s another story I’ll share some day :)

TwO SoNgS FoR MiLe and All

2006-12-21T15:00:00.000-02:00

Not too much to say today, yet so many things....let's the music speak for me....

Artist: Randy Newman Lyrics
Song: You've Got a Friend in Me Lyrics
You've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me
When the road looks rough ahead
And you're miles and miles
From your nice warm bed
You just remember what your old pal said
Boy, you've got a friend in me
Yeah, you've got a friend in me

You've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me
If you've got troubles, I've got 'em too
There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you
We stick together and can see it through
Cause you've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me

Some other folks might be
A little bit smarter than I am
Bigger and stronger too
Maybe
But none of them will ever love you
The way I do, it's me and you

Boy, and as the years go by
Our friendship will never die
You're gonna see it's our destiny
You've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me

Artist: James Taylor Lyrics
Song: You've Got a Friend in Me Lyrics

When you're down and troubled
and you need a helping hand
and nothing whoa nothing is going right.
Close your eyes and think of me
and soon I will be there
to brighten up even your darkest nights.

You just call out my name
and you know whereever I am
I'll come running oh yeah baby
to see you again.
Winter spring summer or fall
all you have to do is call
and I'll be there yeah yeah yeah.
You've got a friend.

If the sky above you
should turn dark and full of clouds
and that old north wind should begin to blow
Keep your head together and call my name out loud
and soon I will be knocking upon your door.
You just call out my name and you know where ever I am
I'll come running to see you again.
Winter, spring, summer or fall
all you got to do is call
and I'll be there, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey, ain't it good to know that you've got a friend?
People can be so cold.
They'll hurt you and desert you.
Well they'll take your soul if you let them.
Oh yeah, but don't you let them.

You just call out my name and you know wherever I am
I'll come running to see you again.
Oh babe, don't you know that,
Winter spring summer or fall,
Hey now, all you've got to do is call.
Lord, I'll be there, yes I will.
You've got a friend.
You've got a friend.
Ain't it good to know you've got a friend.
Ain't it good to know you've got a friend.
You've got a friend

ChRiStMaS TiMe

2006-12-19T23:35:00.000-02:00

For many of my cyber friends, Christmas time comes with cold weather, and in most of the cases, snow. Well, here it goes one picture I took today next to my tree…here it’s full Summer and it’s really suffocating….(as you can see I’m wearing my mini skirt!! LOL, and as you can imagine, I went outside after the pic just to see if my ugly neighbour was around, now she has something to gossip about )

When our ancestors, who were mostly Italian and Spanish immigrants, came to Uruguay, they brought all their customs with them, included their eating habits. So when Christmas comes the family gets together around the table, first on the 24th, to wait for Christmas day, and we eat the same things they used to eat in their countries, food full of calories to endure winter, but here is the middle of the summer!!!!!…in consequence, after dinner we just drop on our armchairs and try hard to catch some air in order to be ready to go out at 12 to fire? some fireworks and greet our neighbours and have some more drinks in the garden….then we get together for lunch on the 25th as well, and we continue eating non-stop. Every year, at least in my house, we say, “No no, next year we WILL eat something lighter”, but we don’t and we won’t I guess.
The problem is that most of us gain some weight in this holidays and since it’s beach time, then we have to stop breathing to hide our tummies when we wear our swimming suits!!! Anyway, I love Christmas and New Year’s Eve, I love being with my family and friends and I love the atmosphere and the hope and all these holidays bring to us.
See ya tomorrow my friends

MeLoDiEs

2006-12-19T00:35:00.000-02:00

Today I was listening to the radio, thing that I seldom do, and I found “Cinema Paradiso”, a melody that I loved and I haven’t heard in years I dare to say. So, I started remembering other movies and of course other melodies. Well, my post today will be that, sharing with you these beautiful melodies; who knows…. perhaps you remember the movies too!!! Enjoy 

RoAsTeD ChIcKeN

2006-12-16T00:21:00.000-02:00

The bad part of writing about those hilarious family stories is that, in general, we can not transmit them with all the colours and the sparks they usually have; on the other hand, if we don’t do it, we risk losing them forever.
I’ll try to share one today.
I assume that when my grandparents got married there wasn’t too much love going on, but they got engaged and, in that time, it was not an option to step back from such a commitment. So they continued together until my grandpa died.
My grandmother used to be out of the house all the time, taking care of her sick relatives, even the ones she didn’t know!!, and if there wasn’t anyone sick she invented it….no wonder my grandpa sooner than later got a secret love, a love that also stood by his side until he passed away.
My grandpa tried hard to hide that relationship, but my grandma found it out and started controlling all his steps so it became too difficult for him to see his love…but then my dad appeared…..
My parents were very young when they met, almost teenagers I’d say, and my dad was extremely respectful of his father in law. Little by little my grandpa convinced my dad of becoming his abettor, and with the story of having a drink with his son in law, my grandpa had the perfect alibi. The thing is that grandpa would pick up dad every day to have the famous drink… the fact is that he would leave my dad alone in the middle of nowhere while he visited his lady and then pick him up again to go home together. Clever uh?
One day this lady gave my grandpa a gift, a little plush chicken, the ones that some people hang in the mirror of the car. Of course my grandpa couldn’t get home with the present, so he told my dad to keep it and to come the following day with the gift as if it were his so my grandma wouldn’t suspect a thing. My dad obeyed.
My dad came, gave the chicken to my grandpa, as it was planned, and went for a walk with my mom….”Success”, he thought.....wrong!!!
Some days later he was invited to have dinner at my mom’s…they were about to start but my grandma told my mom she had forgotten to buy the bread, and asked her to go and get some from the grocery store a block away of the house. My dad stayed alone with my grandparents…there was a strange silence and suddenly my grandma appeared with a covered tray and put it in front of my dad….”open it, please” she said nicely, and my dad uncovered it innocently…and he almost faint… there it was the little chicken, roasted and still smoking!!!! My dad, who is dark skinned, became pale as paper and started stammering….but he couldn’t say anything coherent enough; I guess he was too stunned to say something in front of the poor wire skeleton of the little chicken.
“That will teach you, that will teach you” grandma said…..and sure it did.

KeePiNg SeCrEtS

2006-12-13T11:20:00.000-02:00

Well it’s been a long time since my last post. I feel a little rusty…but let me start by saying that I missed you all.
Thanks for those who worried about me, and thanks for those who wrote me a welcome back message.
Too many things happened during my time offline, the most important was my mom’s illness and of course I’m still in shock for many reasons…..
You see, I’m the youngest child of the family and though I’m 39, my parents still protect me from worries and pains as if I were a little girl. So, it wasn’t until the day before my mom’s hospitalization that I was told the truth, and that because my sister insisted I should know what was going on….and my mother finally called me.
In one second I found out she had had, months ago, a tumour removed from her tongue and that now she had to be hospitalized to get a 4-day caesium session to ensure the good results of the treatment.
My parents came to visit me and my kids in November, they stayed some days, which is strange since my dad hates being away from his house more than one day…but it was my son and my own birthday, so I wasn’t suspicious…..just happy to have them around. The thing is that they left on Tuesday ‘cause they went to the doctor in Montevideo and I never knew that until the face-the-truth call.
Hard to explain my feelings now, I’m scared, I’m angry and I’m restless, scared because I don’t want my mom to suffer, angry because they keep hiding things from me, and restless because every time I call, or they do, they say everything is fine and now I can’t believe that anymore.
I wish my parents knew I’m a grown up now……at least that would give me the chance of being there when they need me, because I know they do….and my sister wouldn’t have to carry alone with all the responsibility plus the burden of keeping the secrets.
I’m going home for Christmas…until then I guess I will have to believe what they tell me on the phone.
Time to go… too much work to do today.

PoR UnA CaBeZa

2006-11-28T11:50:00.000-02:00

Busy day today, so I won’t be able to post anything other than this. I visited some blogs early in the morning and I must confess I stole this idea from LEYLA G .......
What a beautiful TANGO !!! So here it goes…….

Please, take a moment, close your eyes and enjoy….as my father used to say, “ no matter where you are, who you are or how old you are, tango always waits for you, sooner or later you will love it”

See ya my friends :)

UgLy UgLy GrOwN-uP nEiGhBoUr

2006-11-27T13:07:00.000-02:00

And there I was, setting the ground to play hopscotch with my son.
I saw one of my neighbours staring at me, so I said “morning” and continued immerse in my important task…. Ready! Let’s play….

- “You are not going to play, are you? My neighbour asked.
- “Sure I am”, I replied.
- “Uh, don’t you think you are too old to do that?” she insisted
-“Ermmm, I don’t……are you?” I answered with a broad smile and threw the stone to the first square.

It wasn’t the first time she wanted me to behave as a grown-up. “Are you really going to wear that mini skirt?” “You wouldn’t dance that kind of music, would ya” “Why don’t you have your hair cut? It’s too long for your age”, “A tattoo? Are you kidding me?” and so on and on and on…..
The thing is, what is a grown up anyway? According to her comments, a grown-up is a person who “behaves his/her age”
What does that mean? I refuse to give up doing what I like just because someone tells me I’m an adult. Should I stay still, cut my hair and follow the “rules”?….no way!
I know that I won’t start behaving as a child in the middle of my classes..(Sometimes I do, though) or acting silly while having an important meeting, you know what I mean…but all that depends on where I am or what I’m doing, it doesn’t depend on how old I am.
My inner child dances happily inside my soul, and I love every move she makes and I’m more than pleased she’s stayed by my side through the years. I don’t want to watch some kids jumping the rope and think to myself “Oh I wish I could do it!” I just say “Can I?” I jump two or three times and then I continue my way, but extraordinarily happy.
After all, it’s when I’m a grown-up that I suffer the most, or take things more seriously than I should.
So, next step: as soon as classes are over I’ll get my tattoo done on my ankle…. and guess what? I’ll wear my mini skirt, knock my grumpy neighbour’s door and say “hey! look what I have!!!” He he he, too childish I know……I will feel soooooooo good!!!
hopscotch
Grown-up

My MoOd ToDaY:

jOiN mE FoR DiNNeR?

2006-11-26T20:13:00.000-02:00

Nothing much to do on Sunday afternoon, I'm going to cook dinner now, but I prepared this slide to show you the way to my home in case you want to join me.

Once here, you may want to take a look to these pics of my country while dinner is ready :) (hit here)
See ya tomorrow, nite nite.

SuNdAy MoRnInG, GoInG Up

2006-11-26T12:13:00.000-02:00

Well, today I woke up with a renewed energy. As soon as the sun hit my window I jumped out of bed, prepared my

mate and went to the lake. I really love this place.
I sat down for a while to watch the geese and their babies, such a lovely image; sadly I didn’t take my camera with me…..(I post some older pics below anyway)
I got home some minutes ago and I decided to share this with you all, I wanted you to know that I’m doing better and as promised Mile, I’m going up up up little by little…

My MoOd ToDaY

My younger son and me in the lake.... romantic, isn't it?
Spring love on a naked tree....

(if you watched the video, don't blame me if it gets stuck in your head, mahna mahna chu chu ru ru ru haha xoxo)

A nEw AnGeL

2006-11-24T11:01:00.000-02:00

Audrey said

…….Take a good look in the mirror and say hello to that wonderful person reflected there...........OFTEN!!!
Then give her a smile- she deserves it.....

Dear Audrey… your words are so sweet and inspiring! I’m glad you took that walk under the rain with me…I wish I had noticed before that I wasn’t alone after all.
Every day since that rainy day, I have been given a gift from my new friends…today the gift came from you and I can only smile and thank God for such a wonderful blessing.

I’ll be forever sixteen, and I will cherish each kindred soul I meet on my journey, that I promise.

You said you have to master the art of hitting the right key on the keyboard and I smiled since I have the same problem….. but believe me, when I read your words I felt you hit the right key of my heart, and that my friend is all that matters to me.
Than you :)

My EvErYdAy GiFtS…

2006-11-23T13:28:00.000-02:00

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes the most beautiful gifts don’t come enclosed in colorful wrapping paper; they come with the sweet words of people who have enriched my soul.

When I first sat down to write about my experiences here, I thought it was going to be just a different way to release my emotions and feel less stressed.
How wrong I was….how happy I am today I was so wrong.

I have found here that no matter how blue I feel, there is always someone ready to lift my soul, who cares for me, who stays there for me…. even in the distance.

I was blessed with new friends, Ruth, Mile, Cale from different parts of this world and somehow so close to me. So with them by my side, and the ones here, who I won’t ever neglect again, I can say with all the letters, I’m lucky, I’m not alone.

Thank you all for your words….I love you

De VeZ En CuAnDo La ViDa

2006-11-20T13:28:00.000-02:00

Es verdad mile stones , no debería hablar de soledad teniendo dos hermosos hijos, pero la vida es asi…a veces nos juega malas pasadas y nos sentimos solos aun rodeados de tanta gente. Mis hijos colman mi vida, son mi luz y mi soporte para no caer por nada.
HeAvY rAiN es verdad, así me he sentido, es el resultado de una cadena de eventos en mi vida que me hacen sentir solita de vez en cuando, más seguido de lo que quisiera…..
¿Cómo puede pasar esto teniendo dos soles en casa? Pues, durante el día, mi vida gira en torno a ellos, Analía, la madre que soy, se encarga darles todo, de amarlos infinitamente…pero el día termina y al irme a dormir, me espera un cuarto vacío, con una cama perfectamente tenida y nadie con quien hablar, compartir, proyectar. Allí es donde me encuentro con Analía mujer y es donde mi soledad se presenta con todo su peso……
Pero ya sabes mi amigo mile stones , como dice Serrat, "de vez en cuando la vida se hace de nuestra medida y toma nuestro paso, y saca un conejo de la vieja chistera ….y uno es feliz como un niño cuando sale de la escuela."
Lo bueno es, al fin al cabo, que nunca dejo de soñar con un nuevo arco iris.

Hallelujah

2006-11-16T13:21:00.000-02:00

I've been listening to this song all the morning, I don't know why, I'd like to know it, though.......

…….it's not a cry that you hear at night
it's not somebody who's seen the light
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah…..

HeAvY rAiN

2006-11-16T13:08:00.000-02:00

It’s been a while since my last post…this one goes in English so that Ruth and Mousie can understand it if they happened to drop by.....

I’ve been kind of sad lately, I’ll turn 39 in some days and the only idea makes me shiver.
I haven’t found either a place for me in this world, or a clear goal to reach.
Somehow I see myself stuck in this present, too involved with my past and too detached from my future.
Anyway, my friends won’t come to celebrate with me, they are too busy to remember and I won’t say I want them to come. I’ll go out, running away of my loneliness.

Like my soul, it’s been raining all night long; I walked slowly yesterday under pouring rain, there was no reason to run, I was already too wet, too lonely…. too sad…
There wasn’t any hand to hold, any mouth to kiss, any face to dry tenderly….stormy night in heaven, stormy night deep inside me.
I guess the sun will soon come back with a gorgeous rainbow….but for now, I’ll keep watching the clouds go by.

El gato

2006-10-31T13:39:00.000-02:00

Ok, ya lo sé, debí decir que no.
Mi hijo menor vio un gatito en la calle hoy y por supuesto yo al instante le dije "¡Ni se te ocurra!!" pero él no entiende de negativas cuando le conviene.
Por otra parte, el gato conspiró contra mi mirandome con sus ojitos azules,como diciendo "llevame contigo". Bueno, confieso que lo de los ojos tristes son ideas mias, pero la verdad es que es tan lindo el condenado gato.
Pero como que me llamo Analía prometo solemnemente que cuando mi hijo me pida otro animal, le voy a decir "NO" y voy a salir corriendo, ya saben los animales usan estrategias viles para que los traigamamos a casa, o no?

Lo Que Ves De Mi

2006-10-28T13:36:00.000-02:00

Mis miedos nocturnos

2006-10-25T12:39:00.000-02:00

Por lo general no soy una persona a la que asalten los miedos nocturnos, más bien soy un tanto despreocupada si se quiere. Sin embargo, hay ciertas noches, muy de vez en cuando, que me llegan todos los miedos juntos. I cuando digo todos, no exagero en nada! Anoche fue una de esas ocasiones. No se que disparó todo el asunto, solo se que de racional, ayer, no me quedaba nada.

(Hacía calor, mucho calor y no podía dormir. Decidí abrir las ventanas….)
Por fin entró una brisa fresca, pero ¿y si entran insectos mientras estoy dormida? ¿Arañas? No, mejor la vuelvo a cerrar. Dios, que calor que hace! Bueno, las abro tan solo un poquito….
Pero mi cama está a menos de un metro de la ventana, ¿y si se asoma alguien? ¿Si me toca o me roba el teléfono que esta en la mesita de noche? Que dilema, mejor la cierro.
Así no voy a poder dormir, así que la voy a abrir y me quedo mirando para afuera, por lo menos estaré fresca. ¿Y si entra alguien por la puerta del cuarto y no lo veo por estar mirando la ventana? OK, me tiendo boca arriba y con mi visión 20/20 controlo todo el panorama (claro que a las 3 de la mañana, ojos cansados incluidos, empiezo a ver sombras por la rabadilla del ojo) ¿Será un fantasma? No! ¿Por qué habría de haber fantasmas aquí? Es que estoy cansada, nada más. Por las dudas me doy una vuelta por la casa a revisar todo. (No enciendo las luces, apenas se divisan los muebles y me olvido del espejo del pasillo). Ahhhh!!Vi a alguien pasar!!! La puta madre, era yo, que idiota. Me regreso a la cama.
(El viento empieza a soplar mas fuerte y las puertas comienzan a chirriar, mi miedo irracional no asocia viento y puertas golpeándose, lógicamente)
Definitivamente hay fantasmas. Mejor entorno la puerta. ¿Pero si me mira alguien por la rendija? No se que hacer, mejor la cierro completamente. Pero si la cierro no veo si hay alguien detrás, mejor la dejo abierta.
(Se escucha un ruido muy fuerte afuera, como de un avión pasando, pero es de madrugada y el ruido es persistente, me olvido de los fantasmas por un instante)
¿Qué será eso? Se vendrá cayendo un avión? ¿Estará ardiendo la estación de servicio? Seguro que ahora explota todo. Voy a ver por la ventana. No, mejor prefiero no saber. ¿Y si es una ola gigante? Ya mismo la veo aparecer sobre la casa de enfrente. No, eso es imposible! Mejor me acuesto otra vez.
Tengo hambre, me voy a hacer un sándwich, espero que no haya nadie escondido en la cocina.
¿De mortadela o de membrillo? (Comienzo a prepararlo)
Voy a mirar de golpe para atrás y sorprender al que esté parado mirando. Ja!!.... (No hay nadie. Corro para la cama como llevada por el diablo)
¿Qué es ese ruido debajo de la cama? Mejor no miro, pero… decididamente no miro, eso si, por las dudas me tapo los pies (comienzo a sudar)
Ahhhhhhh (la cosa debajo de la cama saltó para arriba y de una patada la hice volar por los aires….. pobre mi perra!!!)

Así fueron pasando las horas, hasta que me sorprendió la madrugada y a pesar de los fantasmas, los ruidos, el tsunami, el avión, la perra voladora y cuanta cosa que se me haya ocurrido, me quedé dormida gracias a Dios.
Creo que hoy volví a ser racional, ya que desperté a las risas acordándome de las pavadas de anoche y quise compartirlo. Quien sabe… quizá haya alguien por allí que se sienta identificado. Es como dicen, mal de muchos, consuelo de bobos.
Hasta la próxima!!

Miedos

Un little bit de Inglés

2006-10-22T22:34:00.000-02:00

A little bit of English, a little bit of Spanish.
Un poquito de Inglés, un poquito de Español.

Why?, ¿Por qué? I don’t know! No se!
Some people don’t understand Spanish and/y otros no entienden Inglés.
So, entonces…
What can I do? Qué puedo hacer?
I’ll see, veré how I fix this, arreglo esto.
LOL –RAC
(laughing out loud-riéndome a carcajadas)
I got it! ¡Lo tengo!
I will learn Chinese, aprenderé Chino
And problem solved, asunto arreglado
Hi 5 / Choque los 5

FoToS

2006-10-22T16:08:00.000-02:00

WiNdS Of ChAnGe

Once again

Just a thought...

Three times a ........

HISTUDIO.TV

Chronicle of Death Not Foretold

It's my Birthday!!

Writing Project..... Proud Teacher!

What I Am Needs No Excuses :)

Pre-Prof Wrinting Project

Nuevo amanecer

Ballad Of The Reflection

Pedro 4:8 ...... It must mean something ......

ThE BrOwN GuY

One Night Standing coming soon.

HaPpY HoLiDaYs :)

ShoRt sToRiEs

RALOS DE PISCINAS - EXIJA FISCALIZAÇÃO!

ThE CoNtEnDeR

Life begins at 40 and at 5

No Voy a Mentirte

A PhOnE CaLL, A SoNg AnD Me

GoOd NeWs

SoMe DaYs I sMiLe

DiFFiCuLt TiMeS

HeRe AgAiN

WhIsPeRs By ThE FiRePlAcE

WhAt aN ArTiSt!

WaTcH OuT ThE GeNtLe WiNd

(updated) cLoSiNg CiRcLeS

OMG!!! (Tuesday update: HAPPY BIRTHDAY RUTH!!!!)

GeTTiNg oLd :(

WiTh ThE fLu

FeLiCeS PaScUaS

FaRewEll Mick.... fLy HiGh

In aNy WaY

It'S So DaMn HaRd

StUbBoRn

***HaStA LuEgO***

SuNdAy'S DiScOvErIeS

fRiDaY / SaTuRdAy uPdAtE

NiCe SuNdAy EvErYwHeRe

SoMe GoOd ThInGs Do HaPpEn

MaGiC NiGhT iN Plumpiemousie

PaCkInG… fOr BeTtEr Or WoRsT

The Way of the World

I AiN't MiSsInG YoU At aLL

CoMiNg SoOn!!!!

GoInG To ThE CaLLs

FrOm SaDnEsS To AnGeR

I'm sTiLL StAnDiNg

FoRsAkEn

GoNe WiTh ThE WiNd

UrUgUaYaN NeSsIe

PrOvEd

TaGgEd AgAiN :)

TaGgEd

BoRiCuAs

PoLLiTo

cHiLdIsH

My BeD.....Mi CaMa

KiNg MoMoS Is CoMiNg!!!

.:.:.:.:.:BeLLe:.:.:.:.:.

TWo PoStS At ThE pRiCe Of OnE

EaSiEr sAiD ThAn dOnE

ScArEd Me? BaH….

An UnExPeCtEd StOpOvEr

aLmOsT CuRsEd.....aLmOsT?

LeT's sMiLe FoR A wHiLe

Kings and Queen

The ThReE WiSe KiNgS

"Uno nunca se está yendo. Siempre está volviendo"

NoT WoRkInG StRaTeGy

BaLaDa DeL ReFlEjO

ThE BiG ReD DoT ….”sMiLeS FaCtOrY”

No TiTlE ToDaY

WhErE CaN I fInD a CoOl PlAcE!!!

ThE NeStS

LoOk WhO’S BaCk :)

HaPpY XmAs My DeAr FrIeNdS

HaStA LuEgO