My deepest fear has become true and now I wonder what it will be of me without him in my life….I feel I won’t be able to go on….I’m sure I won’t be.
I could sense he was drifting apart…that’s something a woman in love never gets wrong…he never dared to admit the end was coming…not until today…the worst day I have never gone through.
The only man I have truly loved decided to move on, leaving me immerse in complete darkness, frightened, and distraught.
And now, where will I find strength to go on if he was my pillar and my foundation…..I’m falling down and what you see it’s what is left from me, just the rubbles of a woman who gave everything she had for this man.
I won’t beg, he won’t hear me saying please come back, but inside my heart there’s a voice shouting “please don’t go away”.
Yes, I know you will tell me that time heals all wounds, that I have to be strong, that there’s hope if there is life…you may be right, but I’m too sad, too tired…I can’t believe there’s a tomorrow for me.
No, I won’t die yet I’m already dead. Those who have loved as I do will understand what I feel.
His love for me has died and I’m grieving.
Some of you have read my story with him…..well, my prince finally gave me the coup of grace….the last stabbing.
I’m mourning my dead dreams my friends, I need time to reassure myself if that is possible…..I can’t see any light right now.
I’m sorry to disappoint all of you….I don’t feel like dancing or smiling, though I know that’s what you always expect from me. I’m falling in a bottomless pit and there’s no way out.
I love him so much, I only want to cry and cry ‘till I drop asleep…..I just can’t go on.
I wonder if he is happy now….I wonder if I deserved this pain….I wonder if she will love him as I do or if he will love her as he loved me once…long time ago.
I’m gone. Don't worry for me. I love you all
7 thought(s):
My dear Analia, I had been wondering what was happening but didn't like to ask. I knew you would say when you felt ready to. There is nothing I can do or say to take away the pain you are feeling now. I can only say that in many different ways we have all suffered what you are suffering now but we have also all come through it and are still here now; time does not heal completely but new people and experiences can give us fresh dreams and hopes for a brighter tomorrow. So for a little while I know you must cry and be so sad and heart broken...but please Analia when you are "all cried out" slowly put back on your dancing shoes, gradually turn the volume up on your MP3, start to sing a few lines of a happy song....it will take time I know to bury this anguish a little deeper; to let life and dreams flood back in.....but it WILL happen........
Till then use us your friends to be your sounding board when you feel your bluest...you must get through this for all of us;... especially for those who have heartbreak yet to come in their lives........they need to see that Analia lived on... so can we!!
Extra {{{HUGS}}} and a shoulder to cry on
Rx
Analia
First NO YOU DONT DESERVE THIS PAIN...you know that..This is something you must go through, Its one of the hardest journeys one makes perhaps, the ears stop hearing and the heart seems to have a will of its own, I know when others told me way back then that one day the pain would go, at the time it felt unbelievable,I felt as if I would grieve forever, days I still do for some of the losses, but its more like a shadow of an ache these days.. This my love is meaningless perhaps at this moment, but this pain will lessen, this pain will ease, not now, not tommorrow we both know that, for now you must honour your love, your gifts, your giving and all that feels lost forever. Days when you smile with a broken heart, its possible... and one day the heart will catch up and become strong again, little by little you will remember the Analia you may feel youve lost for the time being, the Analia, your prince fell in love with....you must remember her too and honour her above all...
Come when and if you need us..always for you are much loved
"No women, no cry." decía Bob Marley
"I’ll be there for you." decía Bon Jovi
Amiga es solo una etapa. Mañana saldrá el sol. Recibe un abrazo y un beso solidario de mi parte.
Sending you a {{{HUG}}}.........
Rx
Hi Analia, I did get your text and attempted a reply but I don't know if it got through to you.
Sending a hug
Rx
Analia; Icarus is still having problems seeing your blog...he has asked that I let you know he is thinking of you.........
Hugs from us bith
Rx & Sx
Analia,
Im thinking of you and just popped by to give you a hug (((((A))))))) Be kind and gentle to yourself angel.x x Auds
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